Pininfarina Battle/Transcript

(Jo Capozza is walking to a car dealership, but stops to see a young girl in a Theory cap worn backwards and a Theory jersey)

Girl: “Jo! Can I have an autograph?”

Jo: “Absolutely!” (These two take an autograph.)

(Cut to the car dealership with two employees and one expensive sports car. It is mainly white with a black trim as well as a red trim.)

Employee #1: “That right there, is the Pininfarina Battista. The commission on that is a whopping 75 grand.”

Employee #2: “Wow. That would change my life.”

Employee #1: (laughing) “There is no way a rookie like you will sell this car. If either of us is gonna sell it, it’s moi.”

(Jo Capozza arrives)

Employee #1: (takes a look at Jo’s appearance) “Dang it!”

Jo: “Excuse me. Is this the all new Pininfarina Battista?”

Employee #1: “That is over two million dollars, ma’am.” (takes a look at Jo’s appearance) “Is that a numbered jersey?”

Jo: “The white T-shirt I’m wearing? Yes.”

Employee #1: “White T-shirt… how plain! I doubt you can afford this car.”

Jo: “Well, I can get one of you to show me the interior, right? Like the interior of my hoodie.”

Employee #1: “That is a small part of what I’m talking about. Maybe there’s much cheaper sports related-“

Employee #2: “Yes, you can absolutely see the interior of the car. I’ll get the keys for you.”

Jo: “Thank you so much! I really appreciate it.”

Employee #1: “Hannah, what do you think you’re doing?”

Hannah: “Helping a potential buyer.”

Employee #1: “BS… she clearly can’t afford this car. You should know just by looking at her.”

Jo feels one of the doors of the car.

Employee #1: “Ma’am… can you please stop touching the car? I’m trying to keep it clean for when someone who can actually afford it comes in to buy it.”

Jo: “Oh, so sorry!”

Employee #1: “I’m about supporting people in sports shirts, but this lady is clearly going to waste your time.”

Hannah: “Look. Appearances can be misleading. Don’t judge a book by its cover.”

Employee #1: “Okay. Now this is why if any of us sells that car, it’s me.”

Jo: “You really shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. She’s right.”

Employee #1: “Did I ask you to give me advice? I wouldn’t be caught dead in your outfit.”

(An Italian sportscaster with a peaked blazer arrives)

Employee #1: (takes a look at his outfit) “Could this be?”

Italian sportscaster: “Excuse me. Is that the new Pininfarina Battista?” (Wears a Brunello Cucinelli suit)

Employee #1: “Yes.”

Italian sportscaster: My name is Lorenzo Lucca. I’m 39, and I’m a sports announcer.”

Employee #1: “Justin, nice to meet you, Lorenzo. What’s this? The Brunello Cucinelli suit? Oh my God! And is this a Pilot’s watch? I can tell you’ve made a lot of money. And we both have an easy time affording that hooded girl’s outfit.”

Lorenzo: (laughs) “Why wouldn’t we? You know, she’s dressed like a guy.”

Justin: “Ah, I see. Well, if anyone’s gonna buy the car, it has to be you! Let me show you the inside!”

Lorenzo: “No. That won’t be necessary. I will take the car.”

Justin: “I knew it!”

Hannah: “I’m back!”

Justin: “Actually, it doesn’t matter. You see, this sports announcer is ready to offer to buy the sports car.”

Lorenzo: “Where are we putting the paperwork to a start?”

Justin: “In my office. It’s right there.”

Justin: “Next time, take my advice. Don’t waste your time with poor-looking people. Maybe then you’ll actually sell a sports car.”

Hannah: “I really apologize. But it looks like there may already be a buyer for the car. But, I’m open for questions if you have any.”

Jo: “OK, sounds good to say the least. Is that the hood? I’m not referring to the one on my jacket.”

Justin: “All we need to do is send your application to the bank and wait for its approval. That’s it. That’s so laughably simple. Even I better believe you’ll be approved.”

Lorenzo: “Amazing. That is pretty good. Wow.”

Justin: “You’re gonna look so phenomenal. Mind blowing in that car. It goes so well with your outfit. It’s gonna be more obvious that you’re a multi millionaire.”

Lorenzo: “Amazing! That’s exactly the look I’m going for! Things are looking so good! I want people to think that I’m unbelievably rich!”

(Cut to Hannah explaining to Jo details about the sports car.)

Hannah: “It has 1700 pound-feet of torque and 1900 horsepower.”

Jo: “What?”

Hannah: “Yes. It does. Also, excellent visibility is provided by the view over the low-sloping hood.”

Jo: “No way! In speaking of hoods, why are you helping a hooded girl like me? My appearance might make you think that I cannot afford this car.”

Hannah: “Your appearance to me is no problem. I’ve realized they can be misleading. So, I try to treat everyone well, no matter what.”

Jo: “Sounds nice.”

Hannah: “My pleasure.”

Justin: “What?! No way.”

Lorenzo: “What’s going on?”

Justin: “To possibly the biggest shock of them all, it’s saying your credit wasn’t approved. Don’t worry, I’m gonna try again and it should go through this time.”

Lorenzo: “Good because I need this car. I need people to think that I’m rich.”

Justin: “This has got to be a joke. Is this for real?! No. I don’t believe this.”

Lorenzo: “You don’t believe what?”

Justin: “Your credit is still not approved. This is utterly stupid. Seriously.” (sighs) “Well just have to do cash then. 2.2 million dollars.”

Lorenzo: “What?! 2.2 million?!?! It doesn’t look like I will have made that much during my entire life!!”

Justin: (laughs) “What do you mean? This is a Brunello Cucinelli designer suit. It’s on top of your watch. You can definitely afford this car.

Lorenzo: “Don’t be fooled by these two things. I may have had a lot of money then, but that doesn’t mean I have a lot of money now.”

(Lorenzo leaves the office to see Hannah again.)

Hannah: “How’d it go? Is the sports car his?”

Justin: “No. It’s not. His credit very shockingly didn’t go through.”

Hannah: “Sorry to hear that.”

Jo: “I’ll take the sports car! I’d like you to start the paperwork right away.”

Hannah: “Oh my God… that’s gonna mean a lot to me. I will get it going, thank you so much.”

Justin: “Absolutely not! My customer would get approved for a loan so very long before you do.”

Jo: “Loan? Who said anything about a loan? I’m paying the 2.2 million bucks in cash.”

Justin: “You’re not!”

Jo: “I am.”

Justin: “How in the world did you even get all that money?”

Jo: “I’m a YouTube celebrity. And I dress like this because I want people to help me for me, and not for my money.”

(The girl who got the autograph walks over to Justin)

Girl: “Dude, you seriously don’t know who Jo Capozza is? She’s a multi-millionaire with over 10 million subscribers!”

Justin: “What’s your name? And how old are you?”

Girl: “Mia. And I just turned 13!”

Justin: “Don’t tell me this is another Theory jersey and Theory cap. Even as a male, I wouldn’t be caught dead in either.”

Jo: “Sorry about that, Mia. Why don’t you take a ride with me in the sports car, once I get everything settled? Let me guess, you would?”

Mia: (gasps) “Absolutely! And I’d like you to make sure people know about the rude man.”

(Justin laughs at that)

Jo: “I’m sure they will.”

Hannah: “Let me give you some advice. Appearances can be misleading. Don’t judge a book by its cover. Maybe then, you’ll actually sell a sports car.”

(Justin begins to look sad)

(Later, at the TT10 headquarters…)

Kendra: “Is Jo alright?”

Sophie: “I don’t know. I hope so.”

(Reicheru notices a Pininfarina Battista carefully parking by the TT10 headquarters.)

Reicheru: “What is that? Who’s in that?”

(Reicheru, Vitalia, and Dick leave the headquarters to check out what is going on, Kendra decides to go with them as well.)

Mia: “That was an awesome car ride, Jo!”

Jo: “Thanks. I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

(Kendra sees that Jo and a girl in a Theory cap and a Theory jersey are in there.)

Reicheru: “Who’s in there?”

Kendra: “You’ll see.”

(Jo and Mia leave the car.)

Vitalia: “Hold on, this is your car?”

Jo: “Technically.”

Dick: “What do you nean?”

Jo: “I decided to get this sports car for you guys.”

Kendra (in surprise): “What?” (screams in happiness and proceeds to hug Jo) “Thank you so much! I mean, I love this car so much by the way!”

Jo: “Uh, you’re so welcome.”

Kendra: (releases Jo from the hug) “What kind of car is it?”

Mia: “Even I know what it is. It’s a 2022 Pininfarina Battista. I really enjoyed riding it.”

Jo: “Yeah. I spent over two million dollars on it.”

Dick: “You didn’t need to stend that nuch noney to get a storts car.”

Kendra: “Eh, it may definitely be worth it, actually. I must take a ride in it!”

Jo: “No worries about that. A sportscaster tried to take it too, but he had nowhere near the cost. The man tried to sell it to him, thinking there was no chance I could afford the car.”

Kendra: “No chance? You’re Jo Capozza! You’re a multimillionaire YouTube celeb!”

Mia: “Exactly! The man said he wouldn’t be caught dead in my outfit.”

Jo: “He also said the same thing about mine!”

Dick: “Not too nuch of a fan of tondoys, huh?”

Jo: “I think the issue was my outfit didn’t cost a lot of money.”

Vitalia: “Guess we shouldn’t judge someone by their appearances, huh?”

Reicheru: “And absolutely not just by human chromosomes.”