Dano Family Revisited/Transcript

8 Years ago...
[We see the words 8 Years Ago...]

[Jeanne punches Jenny's womb]

Ali: "AEN-MIN I'M GONNA KILL YOU!"

[Ali hears a low rumbling sound]

Jo: "I do not like your language Ali!"

Ali: "(Bleep), (bleep), (Long Bleep)!"

Jo: "Ali"

[The family (minus Ali) and Jo are out for a walk]

Kim: "Mommy, where's Ali?"

Jenny: "Oh no..."

Ali: (slurring) "Hyyy moummmm...."

[Toshio brings in the Ikan Bakar]

Ali: (slurring) "Ikkkkannnnn Bakkkarrrrr, Myyyyyy Favoooorittte."

Josie: "OK."

[Josie hears a blast of heavy metal music coming from Ali's room]

And now...
[Frank pulls a prank on Kim]

Kim: "MOM!"

[Bob steps on a neighbor's dog's tail]

[The dog whimpers and runs away]

Apu: "I don't wanna eat it!"

[Day hits Mario]

Mario: "Day, stop it!"

[Chia whines and clings onto Jenny]

[Night spits on Shawna]

Jenny: "Stop!"

Long Time...No See
Annie: "Hello, Jenny. How are you doing?"

Jenny: "I am doing fine, thank you. I was visited by Jo Frost once."

[We see Aini who walks up to Annie]

Aini: "Hi! It is so glad to see you. But we now have some problems in our household, though, thanks to 10 more adopted kids in the house..."

[We see an 8-year-old Akma in a dress]

Akma: "Hello...."

Annie: "Hello Akma."

Akma: "Hi...."

Annie: "How are you?"

Akma: "I'm doing fine."

[We see Day, Night, and Sunday watching We Bare Bears on TV]

Ali: "Danielle died a week ago, over a million devices were affected by an AI virus and she suffered from angina, which tightens the heart, it shut off her heart alarm, she died at 110 years."

Household Issues
[We see Frank playing Call of Duty: Black Ops 8]

Frank: "DIE! YOU IDIOT! DIE!"

Annie: "I could not believe my eyes and ears that Frank was playing a Call of Duty video game that was rated M for Mature. Frank's only 7 and I thought that he should play more age-appropriate games."

Frank: "COME ON! SHOOT HIM! SHOOT HIM!"

[Frank is trying to shoot down a man in the video game]

Shawna: "Stop yelling! Things are getting old right now."

Frank: "SHUT UP YOU F***ING NO-BRAINER!"

Shawna: "WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?"

Frank: "F***ing No-Brainer!"

Shawna: (running off) "MOMMY!"

Naughty Pit
Annie: "If things weren't bad enough, Bob kicked off by repeatedly throwing his toy boomerang around the house. I found it very dangerous and then Jenny placed him on the Naughty Pit for failure to listen to her."

[Bob throws his toy boomerang in the living room, hitting Shawna in the face]

[Shawna begins to cry in pain]

[Jenny goes to Shawna and comes down to her level]

Jenny: "Shawna, what's the matter?"

Shawna: "Bob threw boomerang at me."

Jenny: (to Bob) "Bob, look at me in the eyes. This is your first warning. You don't throw your boomerang in the house because you might hurt others or break something with it. If you throw your boomerang again, you will go to the Naughty Pit and I will take away your boomerang for the rest of the day. Do you understand?"

Bob: "NO!"

[Bob throws his toy boomerang again but this time the boomerang hits Aini's vase that she sculpted and painted in her art class in high school several years ago. The vase falls off the table and it breaks]

[Cut to: Aini in her room watching a YouTube video on her laptop]

Aini: (shocked) "What the heck happened?"

[Aini leaves her room and goes into the living room to notice her now broken vase]

Aini: "Oh, my god! Not my vase! I worked so hard on it at my high school in art class a long time ago!"

Jenny: (to Bob) "You know what, Bob? You're going in the Naughty Pit because you kept throwing your boomerang in the house when I told you not to throw it. I am also taking away your boomerang for the rest of the day."

Bob: "I DON'T WANNA GO! AND I WANT MY BOOOOOOOOOOOOMERAAAAAAANG! YOU'RE A DIPSTICK! RACK OFF!"

Jenny: "Maybe if you're good for the rest of the day, you can get it back, but for now, you're not getting your boomerang. And because you spoke to mommy rudely, I am also taking away your koala plush."

[Jenny carries Bob to the Naughty Pit]

Jenny: (to Bob) "You're now in this pit because you continued to throw your boomerang in the house and you know better than that. Stay in the Naughty Pit for 3 minutes and don't move or your timeout will start over."

[Jenny leaves Bob on the Naughty Pit and confiscates his toy boomerang and his koala plush]

Bob: "I WANT MY BOOMERANG AND MY KOAAAAAAALAAAA!"

Jenny: "If you keep screaming at mommy, your boomerang and your koala will also be gone for tomorrow."

De-Clutter Technique
Annie: "I introduced the De-Clutter Technique to the family."

Annie: "This is the De-Clutter Technique."

Frank: "What's that?"

Annie: "Come with me for a demonstration."

Anti-Pranking Technique
Annie: "When I realized that Frank was about to pull a prank on Ali, I showed mom and dad the Anti-Pranking Technique."

[We see Frank placing a tack on a wooden chair in the living room]

[Ali walks over to the room]

Ali: (thinking) "I'm going to have a breather for a minute.."

Frank: "This tack will hurt his a**!"

Annie: "Jenny, it looks like Frank's trying to pull another prank again. Undo it ASAP by taking the tack off the chair before Ali sits on the chair."

[Jenny quickly removes the tack from the chair just before Ali sits down]

Jenny: "So what do I do now?"

Annie: "Give him small consequences for his attempt at pulling a prank."

Jenny: "Frank, because you tried to play a prank on Ali, no video games this afternoon."

Frank: "Dang you--"

Jenny: "Shhh...."

Great-Grandmother Danielle's funeral
Annie: "When Mom and Dad announced that they are going to Danielle's funeral, the 10 amok runners refused to go and get dressed for the event."

Jenny: "Children, get dressed! We have to go to Danielle's funeral at church!"

Akma: "Coming, grandma!"

Sunday: "I DON'T WANNA GO TO CHURCH!"

Day and Night: "ME NEITHER!"

Jonathan: "Hurry up and get dressed, you three. You have to go to church. We don't want to be late."

Shawna: "NO CHURCH!"

Jenny: "Shawna, mommy wants you to put on your funeral dress."

Shawna: "All right mommy, I'll go."

Jenny: "Good girl. Now go get ready."

[10 minutes later...]

Jenny: "You look gorgeous Shawna."

Bob: "I HATE CHURCH, MATE!"

Jonathan: "Knock it off, Bob. Now put on your suit."

[The two sets of triplets, Frank, Apu, Shawna, and Bob run into the backyard and mess up the Dano Family garden naked]

Shawna: "Here I find myself being naughty again. I'll leave YOU to get into trouble!"

Jonathan: "Shawna Reah Dano! Were you involved in this mess making?"

Shawna: (sadly). Yes daddy I was involved. I'll admit I don't want to ruin Nanny Danielle's funeral. It was my idea to get naked and mess up the garden. I'm sorry. "

Jonathan: "You've admitted you did the wrong thing. However I will have to confiscate your African princess dolls and jewellery for a day. Now give me a hug and get ready."

Shawna: "I'm not gonna misbehave anymore. If I can't communicate, I'll write my thoughts down."

Jenny and Jonathan:" We are proud of you, but still have to take away your African jewellery and dolls."

Shawna: "Aww....."

[Bob grabs his boomerang and throws it at Shawna's nose, causing a nosebleed with blood going down her dress]

[Shawna screams and cries and bawls in pain]

[The aunts and uncles of the Dano Family arrive in cars with cousins Danny Wattson, age 16, Dots Watson, age 14, Ella Wattson, age 11, Preston Dano, age 9, Betty-Jo Dano, age 5, Regan Wattson, age 3, and Kayla Dano, age 1 1/2]

Jenny: "Kids! Your cousins are here!"

[Lucas comes running up to Preston]

Lucas: "Hello, Preston. How is it going?"

Preston: "Ehhh, I feel sad that your great grandmother died."

Lucas: "So do I. We sure miss her very much."

[Frank appears behind Preston and tries to pour cold water on his head with a mug, but misses since Jonathan quickly escorts Preston]

Preston: "Woah! Thanks, Uncle Jonathan."

Jonathan: "Anytime. As for you, Frank, you just lost one hour of TV time for today for trying to prank your cousin."

Frank: "No fair!"

Jonathan: "If you didn't do that, then you wouldn't have lost that hour. Sorry."

Frank: (sighs)

Lucas: "Are you alright, Preston?"

Preston: "Yeah."

Lucas: "Good to hear."

Jenny: "Let's get in the car now."

[10 minutes later, the cars have just left to go to church]

Reflection Room
[Day, Night, and Sunday are watching Adventure Time on TV]

Jonathan: "Day, Night, Sunday, screentime is up. Time to turn off the TV."

Sunday: "Not now, daddy."

Night: "We're watching the best part!"

Day: "Yeah!"

Jonathan: "You can watch more TV tomorrow. Why don't you do something else that you like that doesn't involve a screen?"

Day: "But they're not as fun as watching cartoons like Adventure Time..."

Night: "Or We Bare Bears..."

Sunday: "Or The Magic School Bus..."

Day, Night, and Sunday: (in unison) "Or especially Winnie the Pooh!"

Jonathan: "You can read books, ride your bikes, draw pictures on paper, anything that doesn't require a screen. Now please turn off the TV."

Night: "But those things are boring..."

Jonathan: "Hey. I said, turn the TV off."

Day, Night, and Sunday: "NO!"

Jonathan: "This is a warning. I'm going to count to 3, and if you don't turn off the TV by the time I count to 3, you'll be sent to the Reflection Room. 1...2..."

[The triplets spit in their dad's face]

Jonathan: "That's it. You three are going to the Reflection Room right now."

[Jonathan turns off the TV and sends the triplets to the Reflection Room]

Jonathan: "You three are in this room because you refused to turn off the television and you spat in my face. Now you stay here for 6 minutes. Don't go anywhere."

[Jonathan leaves the triplets in the Reflection Room]