Remano Family/Transcript

before the revolving line of credit
Narrator: "Tonight on Supernanny..."

Sam: "(bleep) OFF!!!!! I AIN'T TURNING IT OFF!"

Narrator: "Jo faces against the most badly behaved children Jo has ever encountered."

Meghann, Sam, Joshua, Bryce, Orla, and Jose: "GO (bleep) ALL OF YOUR (bleep), YOU MOTHER(bleep)ING (bleep)HEADED (bleep)!"

Rowan: "Go and kill yourself!"

Narrator: "Rowan takes three different types of drugs."

Submission Reel
Jo: "I'm in Lincoln, Nebraska, ready to help two parents with the most badly behaved children I have ever seen in my whole life."

???: "Hi, we're the Remano Family!"

Observation Begins
Caller: (talks gibberish)

Bruna: "What?! You gotta be kidding me!"

Jo: "Rowan had been arrested by the police for possession of crystal meth."

Observation Continues
Jo: "Later on, the younger children were invited to a neighbor kid's birthday party."

[Orla, Bryce, Meghann, and Jose arrive with Sam at the kid's birthday party, which is taking place in the backyard]

Sam: "Mom asked me to chaperone Orla, Bryce, Meghann, and Jose as they went over to Danielle's party since she had to go shopping. She was turning 4 years old that day. Danielle is a little sister of my late best friend, Chris. Chris died from a serious overdose on drugs last summer."

[There is a magic show, a bubble show, a clown, Princess Aurora, face painting, balloon twisting, cotton candy, musical games, ponies, Princess Ariel, an arts and crafts table, a Disney Princess moonwalk, a slushie machine, a Princess Castle cake, and a Disney Princess Piñata]

Danielle: "Thank you all for coming to my party."

[Bryce, Meghann, Orla and Jose deposit their presents on the present table]

Danielle's mother: "I appreciate you children coming to Danielle's party."

Jo: "At first, everything turned out fine."

Danielle's mother: "Who wants to ride the ponies?"

Kids: "Me!"

Jo: "But then all of a sudden, Joshua, Bryce, Jose, and Orla started to kick off."

[Orla bites Danielle, causing her to scream]

Danielle: "MOMMY!"

Danielle's mother: "Oh, my god! what happened?!"

Parent Talk
Jo: "I'm here to talk to you about your children."

Jo: "Rowan has been expelled from schools for using and selling drugs, hasn't he?"

House Rules
Jo: "Today, I'm going to introduce some house rules."

Discipline
Jo: "Hugo and Bruna never discipline their children, so today, I introduced some discipline techniques."

Jo: "We have the most badly behaved children I have ever encountered. The household needs discipline. The children were always pushing the limits, and the parents never even discipline their children."

Nicole: "Who are the children?"

Jo: "We have Katarina, age 20, Rowan, age 14, Joshua, age 13, Sam, age 13, Meghann, age 11, Bryce, age 6, Jose, age 4, and Orla, age 3. Katarina is the only well-behaved child. The other children are very far worse. They are crude, have violent outbursts, and they have been expelled from a total of around 50 schools."

Nicole: "OK. The best discipline for Rowan, Joshua, Sam, Meghann and Bryce is the Reflection Room."

Jo: "What about Orla and Jose?"

Nicole: "Give Orla the Naughty Pit and Jose the Naughty Platform."

(back to the Remano Family household)

Jo: "I'd love you to use the Naughty Pit for Orla."

Hugo: "I think it sounds like a good idea."

Jo: "The Naughty Pit is for children 3 and under, so I'm also introducing you the Naughty Platform."

Bruna: "Can we use the platform for Bryce, Rowan, Sam, Joshua, and Meghann, too?"

Jo: "No. Just give them the Reflection Room."

Naughty Pit and Reflection Room
Jo: "It wasn't long before Sam started to kick off."

Bruna: "Sam, you need to turn off your XBOX 360."

Sam: "(bleep) OFF! I AIN'T TURNING IT OFF!"

Bruna: "Then, I'm taking away your XBOX 360."

Sam: "NO, YOU (bleep) AREN'T!"

Bruna: "Yes I am!"

(Bruna confiscates Sam's XBOX 360)

Sam: "I will punch your (bleep) lip in 1 second if you don't shut the (bleep) up!"

Bruna: "Don't even think about it! Just wait until your father gets home!"

Jo: "If you continue to act this way, you're going to the Reflection Room."

Sam: "I never get accused before!"

[Katarina is in her bedroom, working on her term paper for Psychology when she hears the ruckus]

[Sam draws a picture on the wall in Hugo's bedroom of someone resembling the owner being struck to death by cars, lightning, and a steamroller, alongside Bruna, Jo, and Katarina]

Ask Supernanny
Jo: "Parents, your teenager wants to babysit to earn money. When do you feel that you can trust her to accept the babysitting job?"

Nighttime Nightmare
[Rowan runs to his friends' house]

[Sam snatches his mother's credit card, runs outside, and dials a number to Best Buy]

Sam: "I would like Papa's Burgeria HD, Cut the Rope, Angry Birds, Temple Run, Touch the Dead, Ultimate Mortal Kombat, a Nintendo DSi XL, a Nintendo 3DS, Driver: Renegade, Nine Hours, The Walking Dead, XBOX 720, Castle Crashers, Fruit Ninja Kinect, a 16GB SD Card, Real Steel, Mad Riders, NFL Blitz, Harms Way, Dungeon Defenders, Bang Bang Racing, a Nintendo Wii Console Pro, four 5000 nintendo points cards, and five $20 retail price cards please."

[Joshua snatches his father's credit card, joins Sam outside, and dials a number]

Joshua: "Which number can I get guns?"

[Meghann snatches Katarina's credit card, joins the twin teens outside, and dials a number]

Joshua: "I'm going to get guns,"

Meghann: "I'm dialing a number to Target,"

Sam: "And I already dialed a number to Best Buy!"

Katarina: "Hey, where'd my Discover credit card go? It was in my wallet. Mom, Dad, my Discover card is gone!"

Meghann: "MP3 Player and a 128GB SD Card."

Hugo: "And so is my MasterCard credit card. It's missing!"

Joshua: "Rifle, uzi, and shotgun please."

White Sheets
Jo: "Today, I brought in the white sheets. Mom and Dad never disallowed their kids to touch, use, or go."

Jo: "This is the white sheets. Whenever they see the white sheet, it means not touchable. No touch, no use, and no go."

Reinforcement
Hugo: "Sam, how did all that stuff get here?"

Sam: "I ordered them on my phone and paid them on yer wife's Visa credit card in the middle of the night."

Hugo: "Wait, I thought your mother had it with her. You know what? All of this is going back to the store ASAP!"

Bruna: "I also found some guns in Joshua's bedroom. Where did he get them?"

Joshua: "I ordered them on my phone and paid them on yer husband's MasterCard credit card in the middle of the night."

Bruna: "All of this is getting returned ASAP!"

Katarina: "I found a package in the mail and it was for Meghann. I've noticed an MP3 Player and a 128GB SD card."

(Katarina walks over to Meghann)

Katarina: "How did you get the MP3 Player and SD card?"

Meghann: "I ordered them on my phone and paid them on your Discovery credit card in the middle of the night."

Katarina: "It's going back to Sam's club ASAP."

Meghann: "I dialed a number on Target!"

(Hugo and Bruna get in their car)

(Katarina goes in her car)

Jo: "For what you did, you're all going to the Reflection Room."

(Jo sends Sam, Joshua, and Meghann to the Reflection Room)

Jo: "What you did is making me very upset! How dare you all do that?"

Meghann: (sneering) "We dare and we did."

Jo: "Meghann, you just lost your iPhone; Joshua, you lost your iPod Touch; and Sam, you lost your XBOX 360."

[Jo confiscates Meghann's iPhone, Joshua's iPod Touch, and Sam's XBOX 360]

[Sam smashes the crystal ball]

[Sam smashes the fish tank with an aluminum baseball bat]

[Meghann kicks and bites Jo]

[Joshua knocks a pillar over]

[Meghann knocks over a table]

Jo: "If you carry on, not only that I will automatically double your time periods, but you all will lose ALL of your privileges!"

Meghann: "Well, we bought our stuff and the adults are horrible people to return them back!"

Jo: "You've now lost your cell phones for three weeks!"

(Rowan throws a drug at Jo)

Jo: "Let's go. Reflection Room."

[Jo takes Rowan to the Reflection Room]

[Rowan moves out and snatches Jo's Visa credit card]

Rowan: "I would like XBOX 720 please."

Jo: "Now this will double your time period to 28 minutes. You've also lost your cell phone for three weeks."

[Rowan, Sam, Joshua, Meghann, Bryce, Jose, and Orla worked together scribbling some naughty words and pictures of Katarina, Bruna, Hugo, and Jo being struck by lightning and specific cars and run over by steamrollers, on all walls]

[Orla runs outside and Jo tried to chase after Orla, but Orla dashed right in the house and locked Jo outside]

Orla: "Jo's poopoo!"

Jo: "Open the door right now!"

[Jose pees a very long path on the floor]

[Sam throws Bruna's cosmetic kit out the window and it lands in Jo's face]

[Rowan pours beer and wine on the parents' desktop computer]

[Orla beheads someone on the fizz ball table]

[Jose knocks over the fizz ball table]

[Meghann takes a dump on Hugo's office]

[Joshua pees everywhere in Kathryn's bedroom]

[Sam slices Bruna's favorite CD in 32 with his fist]

[Orla closes the reflection room door behind her]

[Jose takes five dumps on the Naughty Platform]

[Katarina, Hugo, and Bruna return home]

[The seven work together ripping the white sheets and throw them in the trash bag]

Hugo: "Jo, what are you doing outside?"

Jo: "I was locked out by your children. They might've done something bad."

Bruna: "We'll go in and take a look."

[The four noticed a picture of some four resembling them being struct and crushed to death by cars, lightning, and a steamroller]

Bruna: "No, ma'ams! No, sirs! Why would you do that?"

Meghann: "Katarina did it."

Bruna: "She did not. It wasn't even there before the three of us went."

Joshua: "Blame Katarina!"

Bruna: "Rowan, Joshua, Sam, Meghann, and Bryce! All of you! It's your butts in the reflection room!"

Rowan: "Not gonna happen, chumps!"

Jo: "Then, we're gonna send you to the reflection room!"

[Bruna noticed that the reflection room was locked]

[Bruna grabs a key and unlocks the door and opens it]

Orla: "All of you are poo-poo!"

[Bruna ignores Orla's comment and confiscates Rowan's iPhone, Meghann's Nintendo 3DS, Sam's PSP, Joshua's iPod Nano and Bryce's Nintendo Wii]

Hugo: "You deserve a trip to the Naughty Pit."

Orla: "NO! I DON'T WANNA GO!"

Bruna: "As for you, Jose, you're going to the Naughty Platform."

[Hugo deposits Orla in the Naughty Pit and confiscates her Dora the Explorer plush doll by placing it in the toy time-out box]

Hugo: "Your Dora's in toy jail."

Bruna: "In the Naughty Platform, Jose."

[Jose spits in Bruna's leg]

The seven VS the Babysitters
Jo: "I convinced Katarina to spend a day at the spa to get her worries off her chest. She was also about to get a job. Hugo and Bruna were going out for some fun activities like eating, a movie, and opera. I arranged a young female babysitter named Stacey, an older female babysitter named Jamie, and another female babysitter named Rosalyn. I thought things were going fine, but they turned out to be an absolute disaster."

Bruna: "Rowan's bedtime is 9:00, Sam's bedtime is also 9:00, Joshua's bedtime is also 9:00, Meghann's bedtime is 8:30, Bryce's bedtime is 8:00, Jose's bedtime is also 8:00, and Orla's bedtime is 7:30.

Katarina: "Rowan, Sam, Joshua, Meghann, and Bryce do timeout in the Reflection Room, Jose does timeout in the Naughty Platform, and Orla does timeout in the Naughty Pit."

Hugo: "See you all guys at 11 PM."

[Orla screams]

[Bryce shouts]

Jamie: "Hey, has anyone seen Rowan?"

[Meghann punches Stacey]

Stacey: "Meghann, you do not punch me."

[Stacey confiscates Meghann's iPad and deposits it into the "Toy Jail for Meghann" box]

Rosalyn: "Jose, where is Rowan?"

Jose: "I don't know."

[Orla spits in Rosalyn's face]

Rosalyn: "Orla, it is unacceptable to spit in my face."

Orla: "Goodbye, you stupid (bleep)!"

[Rosalyn confiscates Orla's Draculaura Doll and Swiper Plush Doll and deposits them into the "Toy Time-Out" box]

[Bryce flips off Jamie]

[Jamie sends Bryce to the Reflection Room]

[Jamie confiscates Bryce's Angry Birds Pig Plush Doll and deposits it into the "Toy Jail for Bryce" box]

[Orla, Jose, and Bryce dart right into Katarina's bedroom and lock the door and work together scribbling some naughty words and seven people resembling the seven adults who they have to listen to being struck and run over by cars, lightning, and a steamroller with their crayons on the walls]

[Orla, Jose, and Bryce dart right out of the room]

Orla: "Goodbye, you stupid (bleep)!"

[Stacey notices that Orla, Jose, and Bryce scribbled some naughty words and the seven adults being struck and crushed to death by cars, lightning, and a steamroller]

Stacey: "Oh, my god! Did you do that?"

Cut to:

Bruna: "It has been a long time since we've dined together, wasn't we?"

???: "Hi, I'm Orla. This is my husband James."

Bruna: "Your name is Orla???"

Orla Kirochu: "There's only one girl you ought to watch for--that's Anna she is 5. She had been expelled from at least two schools She harasses her sister Tariko who's 9 by taking her Azelf plush off her and beheading it and hurts her baby niece Ji kwong who is 4 days old and twins a boy and a girl Ji woong and Ji min respectivley Anna is from Russia The twins and Ji kwong are from South Korea and Tariko is from Japan ."

Bruna: "My children have been expelled from approximately 50 schools in total."

[Bruna hands Orla stapled sheets that consists of papers with lists showing the schools that her children had been expelled from]
 * Rowan-
 * Gibbon High School for selling drugs on school grounds
 * St. Mary's High School for selling cocaine on school grounds and stealing the money from the collection plate
 * Columbus High School for throwing cocaine at his fellow classmates
 * Aquinas High School for selling marijuana on school grounds
 * Weeping Water High School for possession of alcohol and drugs
 * Battle Creek High School for smoking
 * Rock County High School for putting crystal meth on his fellow classmates' lunches
 * Clay Center High School for possession of crystal meth
 * Southwest High School for throwing crystal meth at his fellow classmates
 * Ralston High School for possession of marijuana
 * Exeter-Milligan Public School for lighting a fire on the football field
 * Lincoln East High School for possession of heroin
 * Milliard West High School for pouring wine and beer on his fellow classmates
 * Lincoln High School for smuggling drugs during a school field trip
 * Madison High School throwing crystal meth at the teacher and getting into the alcoholic drinks
 * Creighton Preparatory School for selling heroin and crystal meth
 * Westside High School for selling alcohol and heroin on school grounds
 * Mount Michael Benedictine High School for possession of cocaine
 * Lakeview High School for pouring alcoholic drinks on his fellow classmates
 * Sam-
 * Christ the King School for Bringing a firearm to the classroom
 * Holy Cross School for continual disobedience
 * Monroe Middle School for sexual misconduct
 * Lux Middle School for starting a food fight in the cafeteria
 * Westside Middle School for stealing
 * Pound Middle School for attacking the principal
 * Meghann-
 * St. Stephen the Matyr School for bringing a shotgun to her classroom and threatening to kill her new teacher with it by aiming the ammo from it at her head.
 * Sunrise Elementary School for beating up her fellow classmates and karate-chopping her teacher
 * St. Agnes Academy for physical assault on other students
 * Sword of the Spirit Elementary School for fighting and bullying other kids
 * St. Michael's School for verbal assault against the teachers and students
 * Goodrich Middle School for threatening to behead one of her fellow classmates
 * Mickle Middle School for tugging everyone at the pep rally
 * Scott Middle School for stealing all the money from the collection plate
 * Blessed Sacrament Catholic School for vandalizing the school walls
 * Bryce-
 * Lincoln Christian School for his excessively aggressive behavior towards staff
 * Adams Elementary School for arson
 * St. Patrick's Catholic School for putting cherry bombs on the collection plate
 * Guardian Angels Elementary School for vandalism
 * Roper Elementary School for throwing a cherry bomb at each classroom
 * Campbell Elementary School for flushing a cherry bomb down each urinal in the boys' bathroom
 * Jose-
 * Tiny Tots Preschool for blowing up the boys' bathroom
 * Spring View Elementary School for physical assault against the students
 * Arnold Elementary School for scattering shampoos across the hallway
 * Orla-
 * St. Columbkille Sacredheart Preschool for setting the classroom, the girls' restroom, and her teacher's items on fire
 * KinderCare Preschool for destroying the computers and the furniture
 * All Saints Catholic School for stealing money from the collection plate
 * St. Stephen the Matyr School for bringing a shotgun to her classroom and threatening to kill her new teacher with it by aiming the ammo from it at her head.
 * Sunrise Elementary School for beating up her fellow classmates and karate-chopping her teacher
 * St. Agnes Academy for physical assault on other students
 * Sword of the Spirit Elementary School for fighting and bullying other kids
 * St. Michael's School for verbal assault against the teachers

Orla Kirochu: "Whoa, that's alot of schools that your children got expelled from."

Bruna: "I know. Rowan's our main problem for he is doing illegal drugs."