Carson Family/Transcript

Before the revolving line of credit
Announcer: "Tonight on Supernanny,"

[Claire screams]

Announcer: "One year after his wife's death, a working man and his 23 kids have gotten through their grief, but his youngest daughter likes to take her grief out on Dad and all the other kids,"

Claire: (angrily) "I hate you, Daddy!"

Announcer: "The man has got a grandchild on the way from his oldest son,"

Daryl: "This baby is gonna be cute."

Announcer: "She's a kid who's always eating unhealthy foods."

[Claire snatches gummy worms from the cupboard when Daryl isn't looking]

Announcer: "And even worse, Claire disrespects her family by making fun of her siblings and acting racist."

Claire: "STU IS A BALD-HEADED FUCK!"

[Claire pushes the corners of her eyes at Ryuchi]

Claire: "CHONG CHING CHANG! YOU STUPID ASIAN!"

Announcer: "Can Jo try to help the angry child get her life back on track?"

Claire: "PAIGE IS A FATSO!"

Announcer: "Or will all heck continue to break loose?"

Claire: (angrily) "By the time, I'm finished with you, Supernanny, you'll be dead meat!"

Submission Reel
Jo: "So I'm in Bay City, Michigan, ready to meet a grandpa-to-be who has 24 kids and needs me."

Daryl: "Hi, I'm Daryl Carson. I have two jobs, one's a construction worker and the other's a museum curator. I have twenty-four kids. My oldest, Sean is 27, Michael is 25, Carly is 23, Paige is 22, Nick is 21, Jacqueline is 20, Blake is 19 and has cerebral palsy, John is 18, Denise is 17, Aaron's 16, Derek's 15, Bobby's 14, Jack is 13, Stu's 12, Billy's 11, Quinn's 10, the twins, Rachel and Danny are 9, Nathan's 8, Destiny is 7, Andrew is 6, Erin is 5, Angel is 4 and my youngest, Claire is 3."

Claire: (screaming) "YOU FUCKING MAKE ME ANGRY, DADDY!"

Daryl: "Also, both of my sons, Sean and Michael are married. Sean's married to Marie and Michael is married to Jessica. Sean and Marie are expecting their first child, who is due sometime this month. My first grandbaby. Claire likes to misbehave and make fun of people, even worse she swears. Blake was born with cerebral palsy, Aaron has a hard time doing work due to his dyslexia, John takes 3 showers a day at least, Denise has a gold tooth because of a cavity filled, Bobby is deaf because he played his music too loud all the time, Billy has a birthmark on his forehead, and Stu is bald because he shaved his head in a cancer foundation, St. Baldrick's."

Claire: "SEAN HAS A DRAGON ON HIS ARM! MICHAEL IS A SKINNY FREAK! CARLY WON'T WASH HER HAIR! PAIGE IS A FATSO! NICK IS A PUNK-HEADED SON OF A BITCH! JACQUELINE'S HAIR IS LIKE SUNKIST! BLAKE IS A RETARDED WHEELCHAIR MAN! JOHN WON'T PLAY IN THE MUD! DENISE'S TOOTH LOOKS LIKE HARRY'S TOOTH FROM HOME ALONE! AARON'S TOO LAZY TO READ AND CAN'T SPELL ANYTHING! DEREK WALKS LIKE FORREST GUMP USED TO BEFORE HE STARTED RUNNING! BOBBY'S HAND SIGN LANGUAGE STINKS AND DOES NOT EVEN HEAR A SONIC BOOM! JACK IS GONNA CLIMB A BEANSTALK! STU IS A BALDY! BILLY'S GOT A STRAWBERRY ON HIS HEAD! QUINN IS CRAZY AND RUNS AROUND LIKE AN IDIOT! THE TWINS ARE RETARDS! NATHAN IS A FOUR-EYED PIECE OF SHIT! DESTINY'S TOO OLD FOR CARE BEARS BECAUSE IT IS FOR BABIES! ANDREW SOUNDS LIKE HE SMOKED TONS OF CIGARETTES! ERIN CAN'T STAND ON ONE FOOT AND EVERYONE HATES HER! AND ANGEL IS A BAD GIRL!"

Angel: "Knock it off, Claire."

Daryl: "A year ago, tragedy struck our family for the first time. My wife of 29 years, Doris was out getting food and when she was on her way walking back, it was raining, then a car skidded and hit Doris full-force. When I got to the hospital, I found out Doris was gone. Lord, The kids and I sure do miss her now. Claire's been misbehaving ever since because she loved her mother, like a best friend. She used to be a sweet well-behaved girl like the rest of her siblings when Doris was alive, but now the tragedy caused major changes to her behavior."

Claire: "My mother was the bestest woman in the whole wide world. She was caring."

Daryl: "She was also kicked out of 4 preschools and 2 daycare centers, too and all the facilities I tried."

Claire: "Those facilities suck anyway!"

Daryl: "If I can't help you get yourself to be nice again, then it will be done the hard way."

Daryl: "Also, Claire eats sugary snacks instead of fruits and vegetables and all the other healthy foods."

[Claire swipes a bag of M&M's out of the cupboard]

Daryl: "Please, Supernanny, help me get Claire behaved again!"

Jo: "Don't worry, Daryl. Help is on the way."

Observation begins
[Jo rings the doorbell of the Carson house]

[Daryl comes to the door to answer it]

Daryl: "Hello, Jo."

Jo: "Hello, Daryl."

[Angel is seen coloring]

[We see Andrew, Erin, Stu and Paige]

[Claire comes in and pinches Jo]

Jo: "Ow!"

Claire: "Welcome, welcome, you big fat bitch!"

Daryl: "Claire, we don't pinch or swear at Jo. That is not nice."

[Daryl and Jo sit down]

Jo: "So has this bad stuff happened around here very often, or does it happen a lot?"

Daryl: "Well, the four preschools Claire was kicked out of were St. Stanislaus Elementary School for urinating on teacher's clothes, St. John Lutheran School for placing fake doo-doo in the hall from beginning to end for a prank, Zion Lutheran School for beating up some teachers and students and Trinity Lutheran for attempting to choke a boy. The first daycare she was expelled from was Bay County Child Center for pulling the fire alarm and the other was Webster Center Head Start for beating up some students and speaking poorly of teachers."

Jo: "My, my. Anything else, Daryl?"

Daryl: "Yeah. Claire ruined Thanksgiving last year. I was with the kids at my sister, Gabby's house for dinner. We cooked some food. We prepared everything. When it was time to eat, all of my 24 kids came to the table. When the kids came to the table, that's when things went awry. The kids threw food at each other, and also, Claire burned Andrew's centerpiece he made in school a few days before that. Halloween was also ruined last year because Claire was acting racist to the other trick-or-treaters. My older kids stayed behind and gave out candy. My younger kids went with me trick-or-treating. After we went home, Claire ate her treats first and then, her siblings' treats. She also cut Angel's Minnie Mouse costume into several pieces and broke the ears that came with it. After she ruined Angel's costume, I grounded her for a week."

Jo: "She ruined Thanksgiving and Halloween. Did she ruin any other holidays?"

Daryl: "Yeah. Thanks to Claire, Christmas was ruined. We were shopping for gifts at the mall and Claire was shoplifting some stuff. After that, we went to my father's house for Christmas. During dinner, Claire spit out whatever we served her on the floor. During dessert, she played pig and ate the whole pumpkin pie. She also gorged on the plum pudding, which I saved for her sister, Erin. When we all got up Christmas morning and went down to open our presents, the only present Claire got was a lump of coal because she was on the Naughty List. When she found out about that, she stole everybody's presents, until the others found them. She also pushed the Christmas tree on Andrew, which got him hurt, so he went to the hospital. New Year's Eve was ruined, too, by Claire because she snuck a bottle of vodka mixed with orange juice and drank it all. She got sick and started throwing up on the rug."

Jo: "I saw other kids like that. No wonder Claire would misbehave just because her mother died."

Daryl: "Easter was ruined, too. My kids and I were at my brother, Phil's house to do some Easter egg hunting and all that other Easter stuff. When we were coloring the eggs, Claire swiped three spray-paint cans from the garage. One spray-paint can was red, the other was blue and the third one was black. Claire used the spray-paint instead of painting with a brush. During the Easter egg hunt, Claire broke all of her siblings and cousins' eggs."

Jo: "That don't look good."

Daryl: "I loved my wife more than anything. Now, Claire and all her other siblings and the rest of my family are the only family I have left."

Jo: "In the afternoon the next day, The little kids are outside practicing some golf with all their toy golf stuff, and Claire hurt Erin's eye with a toy golf club."

[Claire hits Erin in the eye with a golf club]

[Erin starts to cry]

Daryl: "What happened?"

Erin: "Claire hit me in the eye!"

[Erin continues crying]

Daryl: "OK. Carly, get some ice."

Carly: "I'm on it, Dad."

Daryl: "I'll take care of Claire."

[Daryl walks to Claire]

[Claire strikes a ball into the hole]

Daryl: "Claire Evelyn Carson, we need to talk."

Claire: "Ha! A hole in one."

[Daryl takes the toy golf club from Claire]

Claire: "Hey! That's mine!"

Daryl: "You definitely had no right to hit Erin in the eye with a golf club. When you say you're sorry to Erin, you can have it back."

Claire: "GIVE IT BACK TO ME NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!"

Daryl: "Say you're sorry and then I'll give it back."

Claire: "NO!"

Daryl: "That's it. Go inside right now."

Claire: (screaming) "FINE, YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING ASSHOLE!"

Daryl: "You know better than to use that type of language, Claire, just because you're angry. Especially in this house. That is not nice."

[Claire angrily storms upstairs, walks into her room and slams her door]

At the market
Jo: "Daryl and the little kids went out to do some grocery shopping the next day in the afternoon."

[Daryl gets a cart]

Daryl: "Alright, kids. Let's get what's on our list, shall we?"

[Claire walks to Daryl with a box of Lucky Charms and puts it in the cart, but Daryl takes it out of the cart and puts it back where it was]

Claire: "But, Daddy, I just want some Lucky Charms."

Daryl: "Not today, Claire. Maybe next time. We will be getting some healthy foods."

Claire: (screeching) "YOU STUPID FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT EXCUSE FOR A FATHER! I'D REALLY LIKE IT IF YOU WOULD LET ME GET WHAT I WANT!"

[Claire looks angry]

[Claire pulls a roll of paper towels from the bottom pile, and the paper towels fall on the floor]

[Claire unrolls the paper towels and drags each of them one by one across the aisle]

[Claire also snatches a Nesquik bottle and drinks it all]

Daryl: "Hey! Drinking and eating before buying is the same as stealing."

[Claire snatches a Hershey bar and is about to open the wrapper as Daryl approaches her]

Daryl: "Claire, put that candy bar back."

Claire: "Fine then. If I can't have any of this stuff, nobody can!"

[Claire snatches a few bags of candy and puts them in the cart, as Daryl puts each one back]

Daryl: "Come on, time to check out."

[Daryl is at the check-out center with the little kids and then they head out to Daryl's SUV]

Jo: "On the way home, Daryl and his younger kids decide to eat at Ruby Tuesday's when Claire wants to eat MaggieMoo's."

Claire: "I WANT MAGGIEMOO'S!"

Daryl: "Not today, Claire. We will be having Ruby Tuesday's for dinner. And besides, MaggieMoo's is a dessert place, that's not dinner, you know."

Carson Family Issues
[Claire is watching The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh when she sees Nick walk into the bathroom]

Claire: "Say goodbye to your mohawk, you fucking piece of shit."

[Claire goes into the bathroom and grabs a pair of clippers]

Nick: "Hey, Claire, what are you up to?"

Claire: "I'm gonna fix your mohawk, Nick. I'll make it look nice. Close your eyes, and don't open them until I'm done."

Nick: "Okay."

[Nick closes his eyes, as Claire runs the clippers through his hair]

[Nick opens one eye]

Nick: "Hey! What are you doing with those clippers, Claire?"

Claire: "Ah! No peeking!"

Nick: "Sorry."

[Claire continues shaving off his mohawk and turns the clippers off after she finishes]

Nick: "What the hell? My mohawk! It's gone! Dad!"

[Daryl gets up from his chair and walks in the bahtroom]

Daryl: "What's going on here? My, my, you don't have a mohawk anymore.

Nick: "Thanks to Claire."

Claire: "Oh, well. Who cares? Nobody liked your mohawk anyway."

Daryl: "Don't worry, Nick. It'll grow back in a while. Claire, come with me right now."

[Daryl takes Claire by the hand and places her in the Naughty Corner]

Claire: "I DON'T WANNA GO TO THE NAUGHTY CORNER!"

Daryl: "You have been sent to the Naughty Corner because of what you did to Nick's mohawk. You're staying here for 3 minutes and thinking about what you've done. Also, I'm taking away your teddy bear."

[Daryl takes the teddy bear off of Claire's bed and puts it in a toybox]

Daryl: "Your teddy bear is in the toybox until you behave yourself the rest of the day."

Claire: "YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT ME, DADDY! ALL YOU CARE ABOUT IS THAT IDIOT WITH THAT FUCKING DRAGON TATTOO, THAT SKINNY PIECE OF SHIT, MISS-I'M-TOO-GOOD-TO-WASH-MY-HAIR, THAT FAT BITCH, THE GUY WHO USED TO HAVE A MOHAWK, THE WHORE WHO HAS ORANGE HAIR,  THE ASSHOLE IN A WHEELCHAIR, MISTER NEAT FREAK, THE BITCH WITH THE GOLD TOOTH, THE PERSON WHO CAN'T LEARN TO READ SHIT, MISTER-I-WALK-LIKE-FORREST-FUCKING-GUMP-USED-TO, THE DEAF LOSER, THE PERSON WITH THE SAME FAIRY TALE CHARACTER NAME, THE BALD-HEADED SHITHEAD, THE PERSON WITH THE FUCKING BIRTHMARK, THAT BITCH WHO RUNS AROUND LIKE CRAZY, THE TWO RETARDS, THE FOUR-EYED PIECE OF CRAP, THAT CARE-BEARS LOVING ASS, THE ASTHMATIC KID, THE PERSON WITH THAT STUPID ASPERGER'S SYNDROME AND THAT OBNOXIOUS BITCH!"

Daryl: "Number one, you do not use that type of language, ever. Number two, because those 23 siblings of yours behave themselves better than you ever do. Don't make me wash that dirty mouth out with soap."

[Claire flips off Daryl]

Daryl: "You don't flip me off either. You know better than that, and that is not very nice."

[Daryl walks out of the room without talking to her, and leaves her in the corner]

Sean comes to visit
Jo: "Daryl's oldest son, Sean comes to visit with his pregnant wife, Marie."

Daryl: "Jo, this is my son, Sean and his wife, Marie."

Jo: "Hello, Sean. Hello, Marie."

Marie: "Hello, you must be Jo Frost."

Sean: "Hi."

Claire: (teasing) "Dragon Arm! Dragon Arm! Dragon Arm! Dragon Arm!"

Daryl: "Just ignore it, son."

Sean: "Hey, Claire, just because I have a dragon tattoo on my arm doesn't mean you can make fun of it or think there's a dragon on my arm."

[Claire laughs]

Daryl: "Just ignore it."

Marie: "That's not nice to make fun of people's tattoos."

Daryl: "Yeah."

[Claire flips off Marie and Sean]

Daryl: "And don't flip your brother or your sister-in-law off either."

Claire: "FUCK YOU!"

Daryl: "Naughty Corner, right this instant."

[Daryl carries Claire to the Naughty Corner]

Claire: "I HATE THE NAUGHTY CORNER!"

Daryl: "Well, you should've thought of that before you made fun of Sean's arm, before you gave him and Marie the finger, and before you swore at me."

Claire: "GO TO HELL!"

Jo: "Just ignore it, Daryl."

[Daryl walks downstairs]

[A few minutes later before Sean and Marie leave, Daryl comes upstairs with them]

Daryl: "Now, I want you to apologize to Sean and Marie and then to me."

Claire: "I'm sorry I made fun of your tattoo, Sean, I'm sorry for flipping you and Marie off, and Dad, I'm sorry for swearing at you."

Daryl: "That's better."

Sean: "Well, time to go, Marie. Bye, Claire."

Marie: "See you."

Parent meeting
Daryl: "I just don't get it. Claire loved Doris more than anything, as much as the rest of her siblings and I did. It's hard to deal with the pain of losing her."

Jo: "Yeah. I'm so sorry. I know you really loved her and the kids did, too, and it just doesn't seem fair when Doris died. Claire seems to be both sad and angry because her mother is no longer with her. I know because I lost a mother when I was very young."

Daryl: "Do you think we could get Claire to try some healthy foods?"

Jo: "I believe that sounds like a possibility."

The Naughty Corner
Daryl: "This here, Jo, is the Naughty Corner. It's where I send Claire when she misbehaves."

Jo: "That's good."

[Andrew comes running to Daryl crying]

Daryl: "What happened, Andrew?"

Andrew: (sobbing) "Claire pushed me off the jungle gym at the park!"

[Claire comes running in]

Claire: (laughing) "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! Now your arm is hurt! Nyah-nyah!"

Daryl: "Claire, you need to come to the Naughty Corner right now!"

[Daryl picks up Claire and carries to the Naughty Corner]

Daryl: "Claire Evelyn, you are in the naughty corner for pushing Andrew off the jungle gym. As punishment, I'm taking away your Winnie the Pooh stuffed animal for the rest of the day."

[Daryl takes Claire's Winnie the Pooh stuffed animal and puts in the toybox and puts a sign on it saying "TOY JAIL"]

Claire: "I WANT POOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Jo: "Ignore her attempts for attention, Daryl. Don't communicate with her, don't talk to her."

[Daryl goes downstairs and takes Andrew into the bathroom and gets some first-aid kit]

Daryl: "There, there, Andrew. Here's a band-aid."

[Daryl applies the Spongebob band-aid to Andrew's arm]

Daryl: "You okay?"

Andrew: "Yeah."

[Claire runs outside to her friend, Makayla's house and they go off to the playground to swing, Daryl walks to the park]

Daryl: "Claire, get back in the Naughty Corner."

Claire: "HELL NO!"

Daryl: "I'm doing this the hard way."

[Daryl takes Claire by the arm and picks her up]

Claire: "I WANT MAKAYLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Daryl: "Not happening."

[Daryl returns Claire to the naughty corner]

Daryl: "Say you're sorry."

Claire: "Fine then. I'm sorry."

Daryl: "Thank you, Claire. I love you."

[Claire hugs Andrew]

Work Out your Anger Technique
Daryl: "Claire, Jo and I have introduced the Work Out Your Anger Technique."

Jo: "It's meant for you to work out the anger of yours."

Claire: "What's that?"

Daryl: "It's to help you when you are getting angry."

Snack Box Technique
Jo: "Since I realized that Claire loves to eat junk food, I thought we'd start removing some snacks and throw them away."

[Daryl and Jo get out a box of Pop Tarts, a box of Cap'n Crunch, a box of Fruity Pebbles cereal, a bag of Chex Mix, various candy bars, cans of Pringles, a bag of Doritos, sunflower seeds, various kinds of trail mix, various kinds of nuts, snack cakes, various dried fruit, various candies, pumpkin seeds, beef jerky, various soda bottles, cans of V-8, various boxes of fruit snacks, boxes of Go-Gurt, Rice Krispie treats, gummy bears, gummy worms, various soda cans and various bags of potato chips]

Daryl: "This is the junk food right here into the trash and the rest of the treats that are good will be put in the clear plastic bin."

[Daryl and Jo deposit the Rice Krispie treats, Chex Mix, pumpkin seeds, beef jerky, cans of V-8, sunflower seeds, nuts, dried fruit, trail mix into the clear plastic bin]

[Daryl and Jo start throwing the junk food into the trash, until there was no junk food left]

Jo: "Well done, Daryl. Well done."

Daryl: "Now there's no more unhealthy food. Just healthy food around the house."

[A few minutes later, Claire goes downstairs to find that all her snacks are gone]

Claire: "What the fuck?! My snacks! They've disappeared! Dad! Jo!"

Daryl: "What is it, Claire?"

Jo: "Yeah, Claire, what is it, dear?"

Claire: "My snacks are all gone, and I didn't even get to eat them yet!"

Jo: "That's because you're not going to, Claire. We threw them away."

Claire: "Why?"

Jo: "Because they're unhealthy."

Claire: "THIS ISN'T FAIR! I WANT MY SNACKS BACK!"

Daryl: "Calm down, Claire. We still have food left."

Claire: "NO, I WON'T! NOW I'M GONNA STARVE!

Jo: "Listen, I promise you won't starve, Claire. But from now on, you'll just have to eat healthy food. Okay?"

Claire: (angrily) "THAT'S IT! YOU TWO ARE GONNA DIE! I'M GONNA KILL YOU TWO FOR THIS RIGHT HERE AND RIGHT NOW!"

[Claire tries to punch Jo, but Daryl blocks Claire's fist from doing so, Claire is in tears]

Daryl: "Claire, just count to 10 and calm down, okay? Like we said, you'll have something to eat. Just healthy food."

[Claire starts to cry, runs upstairs, then slams her door and locks it]

Daryl: "This is my fault. I know I shouldn't have thrown Claire's snacks out, but sooner or later, I'll bet she'll try new foods."

Jo: "That food she used to eat is unhealthy anyway."

Announcer: "Coming up next..."

[Claire throws a plate of celery at a waiter]

Announcer: "Claire makes a scene in a restaurant. We'll find out when Supernanny returns."

Eating at a restaurant
Jo: "Daryl has decided to take his kids out to a restaurant to have some dinner."

Claire: "I.... HATE.... CELERY!!!!"

Daryl: "Just try some. You never even tried them, Claire."

Carly: "Yeah. You wanna get healthy, don't you?"

[Claire flips off Carly]

Daryl: "Hey, don't flip your sister off."

[The waiter brings the family's orders to the table, Claire tries to get some bread, but Daryl stops her]

Daryl: "No bread until you eat your celery."

[Claire throws a bowl of celery at the waiter]

Claire: "Ha, ha!"

Daryl: "As soon as we get back home, you're going to the Naughty Corner. You hear me? Let's go."

Paige: "Wait, I was gonna finish my dinner. And I was thinking about getting dessert."

Daryl: "We will next time, Paige. We're leaving because of the way your little sister acted."

[Claire starts to scream her head off and bawl]

Claire: "I WANNA GO BACCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!"

Daryl: "Get in the car now."

[Daryl picks up Claire and straps her in her car seat and then they drive home and put her in the Naughty Corner]

Daryl: "Claire, the way you acted at the restaurant was completely embarrassing. Until you start behaving again, say goodbye to restaurants."

Claire: "I HATE YOU!"

Puzzle time
Jo: "The next day, Daryl and the others were putting together a 200-piece puzzle, but Claire was acting up."

[The family is putting together a puzzle of a tiger]

[Claire bites Quinn on the arm and then smacks her in the face]

Quinn: (sobbing) "Daddy! Claire smacked me in the face and bit me!"

Claire: "I did not!"

Quinn: "Liar!"

Daryl: "Why did you bite her?"

Claire: "Because "Crazy Girl" was making fun of the way I put the puzzle together."

Daryl: "Consider yourself Naughty Corner-bound. Come with me."

[Daryl walks Claire to the Naughty Corner]

Daryl: "Stay right there. Don't move."

Claire: "DROP DEAD, YOU SICK SON OF A BITCH!"

Jo: "Just ignore it."

[Daryl walks back downstairs]

Swear Jar
Jo: "This is the Swear Jar. Every time you say a bad word, you will put in, a quarter in here Claire."

Feelings Chart
Jo: "I decided to introduce a Feelings Chart for Claire."

Jo: "Kids, this is the Feelings Chart. This is meant for Claire."

Claire: "I hate your fucking Feelings Chart."

Daryl: "Listen, Claire, it's meant for you to explain your feelings, darling."

Claire: "Well, I don't give a shit."

Daryl: "If you continue your bad behavior, guess where you're going? The Naughty Corner."

Claire: "EAT SHIT!"

Daryl: "That does it. Naughty Corner."

[Claire walks to the Naughty Corner]

Daryl: "As a result for your behavior about the Feelings Chart, you lost all your Barbie Dolls for the rest of the day."

[Daryl puts all of Claire's Barbie dolls in Toy Jail]

Claire: "I WANT MY DOLLS!"

Daryl: "You'll get them back if you behave the rest of the day."

Claire: "YOU LOVE SEAN, MICHAEL, CARLY, PAIGE, NICK, JACQUELINE, BLAKE, JOHN, DENISE, AARON, DEREK, BOBBY, JACK, STU, BILLY, QUINN, RACHEL, DANNY, NATHAN, DESTINY, ANDREW, ERIN AND ANGEL MORE THAN ME!"

Daryl: "Because unlike you, they're good and well-behaved. That's three quarters going in the Swear Jar."

Claire: "I'm sorry. I get it. I shouldn't have disrespected your feelings chart."

Daryl: "That's better. Now give me a hug."

[Claire hugs Daryl]

Rules of the house
Jo: "Since Claire breaks the rules, I decided to lay down the house rules."

Jo: "Here's the rules. Number one, Talk in a civil tone. That means no swearing or talking back. Number two, when your family goes somewhere, stay with them, don't wander off. Number three, always have nice manners. Number four, don't embarrass people. Number five, do not make fun of people, especially your siblings. Number six, do not act racist to anyone. Number seven, do not be a bad sport. Number eight, don't cheat at games. Number nine, do not bite. Number ten, do not call people names. Number eleven, do not be grabby. Number twelve, do not tattle or throw food. Number thirteen, don't be rude."

Claire: "Your rules suck."

Daryl: "Claire, do not disrespect the rules, even if you don't agree with them."

Claire: "Oh, sorry."

Daryl: "I'm sure Claire will follow these rules."

DVD meeting
Jo: "Everybody, welcome to our DVD meeting."

[Jo turns on the DVD, and the DVD plays]

[From the shopping trip]

Claire: "YOU STUPID FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT EXCUSE FOR A FATHER! I'D REALLY LIKE IT IF YOU WOULD ME GET WHAT I WANT!"

Daryl: "I don't get it. Claire acting up at the grocery store was a sign of misbehaving."

Nick: "Definitely. She was acting up there."

Blake: "She was. She still misses mom. She must be angry with Mom for leaving us."

Denise: "I guess so."

Jo: "Has she talked to a counselor?"

Jacqueline: "No. We tried, but she doesn't want to talk about it."

Daryl: "I know. She swore twice, so that meant two quarters were put in the swear jar."

Epic Tantrum
Claire: "Daddy, can I have some pizza for dinner?"

Daryl: "No, Claire."

Claire: "I WANT PIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Daryl: "I said no. Not tonight, Claire. You're having vegetable soup for dinner."

[Claire turns off the stove and flips the pot over, spilling all the vegetable soup out]

Daryl: "That's it. Naughty Corner!"

Claire: "I HATE VEGETABLE SOUP!"

[Daryl carries Claire to the Naughty Corner]

Daryl: "Stay right there for three minutes, Claire."

Claire: "I HATE YOU!"

[Claire flips off Daryl]

Claire's so-called friends
Girl: "You're late, Claire."

Claire: "Sorry, Connie. I had to clean some tables."

Connie: "You wanna toilet paper some houses?"

Claire: "Sure thing."

Claire acts racist to other kids
[Claire sees a Japanese boy her age named Ryuchi, a Mexican girl named Ella and an African-American girl named Mimi]

Claire: "CHONG CHING CHANG, YOU STUPID ASIAN! ELLA IS A BIG FAT CHALUPA! AND MIMI IS A N****R!"

[Daryl keeps her on a leash to keep her out of trouble]

Daryl: "Do not act racist to those kids, or you're going to the Naughty Corner, you hear me? That is not very nice."

Sean and Marie visit again
Daryl: "Hello, Sean. You came to visit again."

Sean: "Hello. We came. How's everything?"

Daryl: "It's alright, except for Claire misbehaving."

Sean: "Claire was misbehaving?"

Daryl: "Yeah. She T.P.'ed a few houses, got angry at me for throwing her snacks out and flipped me off."

Sean: "Not good."

Marie goes into labor
Marie: "Sean, my water broke! It's time to go! Now!"

Sean: "Okay, don't panic. We're all going to the hospital."

[Daryl and the others go to the hospital, and then Marie pushed a few times and out came a baby girl, Daryl and the others go into the emergency room to see the baby]

Jo: "So any ideas on names?"

Marie: "We named her Gabriella."

[Sean hands Gabriella to Daryl]

Daryl: "Hello, Gabriella. Welcome to the family."

[A tear of joy falls from Daryl's eye]

Sean: "Welcome to the world, Gabriella Renee Doris Carson."

The babysitter
Jo: "Claire was acting mean to her babysitter, Erica, while Daryl and the others had to spend time with Sean and Marie, until they got home that night."

Claire: "I FUCKING HATE YOU! SO YOU MUST DROP DEAD!"

[Claire flips Erica off]

Erica: "First of all, you do not swear at me, ever. Second of all, you do not tell me to drop dead. Third of all, you do not flip me off. That is not nice."

[Claire races outside and goes on the merry-go round at the playground, Erica runs there and catches her]

Erica: "Get off the merry-go round and come home. I'm serious, you know well you are not supposed to be at the playground without permission from a grownup."

[Claire hits Erica]

Erica: "Ow! That hurt!"

[A few minutes later, Daryl and the rest of the family returns home]

Erica: "Daryl, Claire was being the bad one here."

Daryl: "What happened, Erica?"

Erica: "She swore at me, told me to drop dead, flipped me off, and ran to the playground without permission. Even worse, she hit me."

Daryl: "Claire, what do you have to say to her?"

Claire: "I'm sorry for doing what I did."

Erica: "Apology accepted."

Claire goes to the hospital
[We see a pond]

Jo: "Have you learned your lesson, Claire?"

[Claire ignores Jo and jumps into the pond]

Jo: "What do you think you're doing, Claire?"

Claire: "Swimming in this pond."

Jo: "You're only 3. You can't swim without your water wings."

[Claire realizes she doesn't have inflatable armbands on and starts flapping her arms]

Claire: "Help! Help! I'm drowning!"

[Daryl and Carly jump into the water, as do John and Nick, Daryl and Carly grab Claire, and Daryl, Carly, Nick and John carry her back to shore]

Daryl: "Breathe, Claire. Breathe. Jacqueline, call an ambulance."

Jacqueline: "I'm on it."

[Jacqueline calls an ambulance and the ambulance comes and takes Claire to the hospital, Carly, Nick, Jacqueline and John climbed in, while Daryl and the others followed in his station wagon]

Daryl: "I hope Claire's OK."

[Sean and Michael arrive]

Sean: "Hey, Dad."

Michael: "We came as soon as we heard."

Sean: "How's Claire?"

Daryl: "I'm just hoping she makes it."

Michael: "Don't worry. She will."

[Daryl, Sean, Michael, Carly, Nick, Jacqueline, John, Paige, Blake, Denise, Aaron, Derek, Bobby, Jack, Stu, Billy, Quinn, Rachel, Danny, Nathan, Destiny, Andrew, Erin, Angel and Jo gather by Claire's bed]

Claire: "Hi, Daddy."

Daryl: "Hello, sweetheart. We brought in a TV for you."

Claire changes her ways
Jo: "So you started acting up because your mom died?"

Claire: "Yes, I was sad and angry because mommy left us."

Daryl: "Listen, Claire, don't be sad or angry anymore. I guarantee Mommy's watching us down from Heaven."

Claire: "I miss her."

Daryl: "I miss her too, sweetie. I loved your mother very much as much as you and the rest of your siblings did. It's not my fault she's not here anymore. And it's not anybody else's fault either."

Claire: "How can it not be your fault?"

Daryl: "See, Claire, I know your mother's death was terrible for you, but believe me, it was terrible for me, too. All we have to do is make this bring us closer together. You, the rest of your siblings, everyone else in my family and I are the only family we have left."

Claire: "It was you and the others and it was me and my mother."

Daryl: "I love you, Claire. You're my daughter, my child. You're so much like your mother, and I don't have her here anymore."

Claire: "I know that."

[Ryuchi, Ella and Mimi come in to see Claire]

Ryuchi: "Hello."

Ella: "What's up?"

Mimi: "Hi."

Claire: "Ryuchi, Ella, Mimi, I'm so sorry for being racist to you three. I will never act racist to you three again."

Ella: "It's okay."

Mimi: "It's alright."

Ryuchi: "Apology accepted."

Claire: "And I'm sorry for making fun of you people."

Bobby: "It's alright."

Jack: "Apology accepted."

[Daryl hugs Claire and the rest of the family does as well]

Daryl: "I love you, Claire."

Claire: "I love you too, Daddy."

[A few minutes later, Daryl and the others visit Doris's grave and Daryl places a rose on it]

[The gravestone said: Doris Yvonne Conway Carson, April 12, 1969-June 8, 2027, Beloved wife, mother, daughter, sister, cousin and friend]

Daryl: "I miss you, Doris."

Saying goodbye
Jo: "A few days later, it was time for me to go home."

Jo: "Goodbye, Daryl."

Daryl: "Goodbye, Jo."

Jo: "Goodbye, Claire. Be good from now on."

Claire: "I will. Goodbye, Jo. I'll miss you."

Family update
[Daryl and the kids are at an amusement park]

Daryl: "Everything's okay now, as Claire no longer misbehaves, or swears, or makes fun of her siblings, or acts racist to kids, and she has not been back to the Naughty Corner since."