Beauregard Family/Transcript

Tonight on Supernanny
Announcer: "Tonight on Supernanny..."

Melissa: "YOU ALWAYS FAVOR JENNIFER MORE THAN ME AND DIANA!!!!"

Announcer: "Jo meets the Beauregard family."

Diana: "YOU ARE DUMB!"

Submission Reel
Jo: "You are with me in Miles City, Montana, ready to help a single mother. Let's take a peek."

???: "Hi, I'm Violet, and I'm a single divorced mom. I have three girls, Melissa, aged 16, Diana, aged 12 and Jennifer aged 6 1/2 and will soon be turning 7."

Violet: "Jennifer is the only one in this family, who is 100% well-behaved."

Violet: "My former husband Edward is now back in Atlanta, Georgia."

[We see a picture of Violet's former husband Edward]

Violet: "Melissa has been expelled from school for setting it on fire and Diana is on the edge of getting expelled from her second school."

Violet: "We've tried Military School in London, Behavior Modification Camp in Oregon, Boot Camp, Theraputic Boarding School in Utah and Residential Treatment Center for both girls and Teen Camp for Melissa, but nothing worked out for those two. I even tried Nanny 911, but Diana and Melissa drove Nanny Yvonne away."

Jo Arrives at the Beauregard Doorstep
[Jo arrives at a three-story house]

[Jo rings the doorbell]

Violet: "Hi Jo, how are you doing? I'm Violet."

AM Morning
Violet: "Have a good day in school, Jennifer!"

Jo: "It didn't take me long to realize that Melissa and Diana were the main problem in the household."

Melissa: "YOU ALWAYS FAVOR JENNIFER MORE THAN YOU DO ME AND DIANA!!!"

Jo: "Melissa complained that she was jealous of Jennifer since Violet liked her better than her and Diana."

Violet: "Unlike the two of you, Jennifer has good behavior. Plus she gets good grades at school."

Violet: "When Melissa or Diana say that I favor Jennifer more than I do with them, it just breaks my heart."

Melissa: "IT'S ALWAYS WHAT JENNIFER WANTS! WHEN WE WANT TO DO SOMETHING, IT'S 'NO, NO, NO, NOT TODAY!'!!! Jennifer is such a goody-goody. What so great about being good, anyway?"

Diana: "YOU NEVER CARE ABOUT US MOM!!!! YOU NEVER DO!!!"

Violet: "Jennifer is well-behaved, unlike you. She gets good grades at school!"

Melissa: "Well, you used to be a rude and competitive person who won a lot of trophies...and chewed gum for three months, right?"

Violet: "Yes, that was a very long time ago."

PM Afternoon
Jo: "After the girls are upstairs in their bedrooms, I decided to sit down to have a nice, friendly chat with Violet about the girls."

Jo: "Tell me about your oldest girls' behaviors."

Violet: "Well, Jo, I'm afraid to tell you that my oldest girls Melissa and Diana were expelled from one school each, but Diana is on the edge of getting kicked out of her second school. Melissa was expelled from Custer County District High School for setting the entire school on fire with a match. The reason why she did that because she was upset that she didn't get the part in the school play called In the Woods. When I arrived to collect her after I recieved a phone call from Principal Brown, I noticed that the cops were everywhere. That young lady was so lucky that she didn't get sent to jail for arson and so I decided to send her to Teen Camp until I can find her another school to attend. After I found Melissa another school to attend I recieved a phone call from the two principals Sheila and Mark saying that Melissa took off with her boyfriend named Francis. And Diana was kicked out of Riverview School for gossiping and is now on the brink of getting kicked out of her second school for stealing. Due to Melissa getting kicked out of Teen Camp and Diana getting expelled, I decided to send them both to Behavior Modification Camp, but unfortunately, "

Jo: "Has any holiday been ruined?"

Violet: "Well, Melissa and Diana ruined Halloween. They bought a dynamite on eBay and used that to blow up Mrs Lacey's car. They also vandalized the neighborhood by TP'ing the neighbors' houses and trees, throwing large chunks of stones at windows and blowing up jack-o-lanterns. The poor woman was so upset that she has moved out of Miles City altogether. Not only that, Diana ate almost all of Jennifer's candy which she brought home from trick or treating while Melissa broke almost all of my Flavorstone cookware appliances by melting them in a fire she lit in the backyard and I tried to put the fire out with the fire extinguisher and so I had to buy some new cookware appliances."

Jo: "Oh, dear."

Violet: "And Thanksgiving was a complete disaster. Melissa didn't even spend Thanksgiving with the family as she DECIDED to spend it with her best friend Jessica Spano! Diana whined and complained that the turkey was dry and not real. Her exact words were: 'I want REAL turkey not PROCESSED turkey'. Diana then ruined the night by having a food fight with her cousins. As you can see, my former husband's side of the family is Italian and the main culprits were Mary, Giovanni, Francesca and Megan. Then just after Thanksgiving, my grandfather's funeral was ruined, that's my mom's father because Diana took a dump in the casket and she and Melissa caused a riot."

Jo: "Oh my."

Violet: "And Christmas was totally ho-ho-horrible. You see, Melissa and Diana mere messing with the controls during Jennifer's Christmas play, The Velveteen Rabbit. They cut holes into Jennifer's Nursery Magical Fairy costume and set the prop toys on a real fire with a dangerous match before the show even began. Melissa, Diana, Jennifer and I were at my parents' house for the holidays. When we went Christmas shopping, Diana and Melissa were caught shoplifting over hundreds of dollars of merchandise. Two days before Christmas Eve, my cousin Fauna was getting married to her boyfriend named Ethan who lives in Atlanta, Georgia and the lucky Jennifer got to play one of the flower girls and she and Fauna are so close to each other."

[We see a picture of Jennifer and Fauna on her wedding day which Violet took with her camera]

[Cut back to Violet talking]

Violet: "But Melissa and Diana ruined Fauna's wedding by speaking out during the ceremony, smashing the wedding cake into Ethan and telling the DJ to change the music. Then on the day of Christmas, Melissa and Diana only found coal in their stockings and they each got nothing but notes from the angry Santa Claus as their Christmas presents. And they began to get a jealous revenge on Jennifer for being the only one who got presents and Melissa threw a chair, knocking a Christmas tree over Jennifer and then they stole all their cousins' presents before Diana hits Jennifer's head with a wooden hammer, luckily her skull wasn't broken and Melissa repeatedly beats Jennifer across her face with a hard book. So I had to bring Jennifer into casualty to get her treated. After Jennifer and I got back from casualty and got her a treat from the toy store, the Christmas Dinner, which my mother made was ruined, courtesy of those two ungrateful twits, because they brought in the neighbor's dogs."

Jo: "Oh, how horrible."

Violet: "And New Year's Eve was an absolute disgrace. Melissa decided to throw this wild party without my permission while Jennifer and I went to my parents house for dinner. At about 10:30pm, I got a call from the police saying that Melissa and her party guests were under the influence of alcohol and drugs. I was so embarrassed and ashamed. And what was Diana doing? Oh yes, Diana decided to go for a joyride on Mr Parker's motorcycle around the town and ended up going to hospital suffering a gravel rash. She's lucky that Mr Parker didn't press charges and so I made her and Melissa miss the ball drop at Times Square in New York City on TV. And as a result of ruining both Christmas and the New Year, I decided to send them straight to Military School in London."

Jo: "That's the worst way to celebrate New Years. How did the Military School in London work out?"

Violet: "Not so well. I was playing video games with Jennifer until the phone rang and the principal Sgt. Melissa Patrick called to say that Melissa and Diana were monsters. So I left Jennifer with my parents while I flew to London to bring her sisters back home."

Jo: "Oh."

Violet: "And Easter was a living nightmare caused by Melissa and Diana themselves. The girls and I were at my parents' house for the Easter party and they attacked the Easter bunny who came to visit. They also ruined the Easter egg hunt by stealing all of the eggs from their cousins and started the color splash fight while Jennifer and her cousins were painting the eggs."

Jo: "My word."

Violet: "And they also ruined 4th of July by causing havoc at the 4th of July picnic we went to. They threw food at the other guests, ran around the park dressed in revealing clothes. The security guards caught both of them. They were returned to me and that night, the two were setting off fireworks toward the ground and caused a fire. Therefore, the police took them to juvenile prison for a month for causing a fire that damaged some of the homes. Then a month later, they had to go to juvenile court and they were sentenced to 250 hours of community service."

Jo: "I can only imagine."

Violet: "And Groundhog Day was destroyed because the girls killed the poor groundhog with lethal weapons."

Jo: "Poor thing."

Violet: "And they even lacerated Jennifer with a knife they used to kill the groundhog. As a result of Jennifer's laceration, I sent those two straight to a Theraputic Boarding School in Utah for troubled youths while Jennifer is still recovering in hospital. My parents looked after Jennifer in hospital while I dropped Melissa and Diana off to a Therapeutic Boarding School."

Jo: "And how did the therapeutic boarding school work out for you?"

Violet: "While I was staying with Jennifer at the hospital, my dad received a phone call from the principal of the Therapeutic Boarding School, Mrs. Hilton, saying that Melissa and Diana were completely out of control. So dad called me on the phone in Jennifer's hospital room that I must pick up those two and he stayed with Jennifer while my mom drove me to Utah to get them."

Jo: "Oh, my word."

???: "Come on, hurry, Melissa and Diana!"

Melissa: "Coming, Jessica! Come on, Diana."

Diana: "See you later, losers!!!"

Jo: "My word, who is that girl?"

Violet: "Oh, that's Jessica. She is much older than Melissa and Diana. Believe me, Jessica is bad news. Also, Melissa has a boyfriend named Francis who is older than her. I tried everything, even the reality TV show called World's Strictest Parents. I have a feeling that they must be following MY footsteps from when I was young!"

Dinnertime
Diana: "Can Melissa and I have some Wonka bars, please?"

Violet: "No, sweetie, we're going to begin to make and have dinner soon."

Melissa: "But mom, we want them!"

Violet: "You can have them after dinner is over."

[Violet is cooking dinner]

Diana: "What's for dinner, anyway?"

Violet: Corned beef casserole.

Melissa: Ew! Not corned beef casserole!

Time to Go Shopping
Violet: "And then after dinner, I decided to take Melissa and Diana out to pick and buy some birthday presents for Jennifer, who will be turning 7 soon."

Violet: "Have fun with Charlotte, Jennifer!"

Jennifer: "I will!"

[Violet, Melissa, Diana and Jo arrive at the mall]

[Diana shoplifts a pair of earrings]

[Melissa shoplifts a necklace]

[Diana shoplifts a pair of ray bans]

Violet: "What are you doing?"

[Two security guards approach Melissa and Diana]

Security Guard 1: "Ladies, I need to examine your pockets real quick."

[Security guards examine Diana and Melissa's pockets]

Parent Meeting
Violet: Yes, I must admit. They may be following my footsteps...

The Phone Call
[Nicole is on the computer while Kayla and Orla are working on a science project]

Nicole: "Hello, who's calling?"

Violet: "Violet Beauregard, single divorced mom of three girls, Melissa aged 16, Jennifer aged 6 going on 7 soon and Diana aged 12 who is on the edge of getting expelled from her second school."

Nicole: "What's been going on with them?"

Violet: "Well, Nicole, Jennifer is the only one who is a 100% well behaved in my family but Melissa and Diana are not. They were always bullying my little Jenny and Melissa got into alcoholic drinks, got expelled from school for setting it on fire and Diana "

Nicole: "Well, as far as I'm concerned, Melissa and Diana will have to go in the Calm Zone if they continue being naughty. Melissa will stay in the Calm Down Zone for 16 minutes and Diana, 12 minutes. Have you got it in your head, Violet?"

Violet: "Got it!"

Nicole: "Good girl, Violet. I hope you'll enjoy your new discipline techniques."

Violet: "Thanks Nicole!"

House Rules
Jo: "This family needed some rules in this house."

Jo: "Rule number 1 - Always respect others."

Diana: *scoffs* "Yeah right."

Violet: "Diana, shhh."

Jo: "Rule number 2 - Be home on time."

Melissa: "Kill me now!"

Jo: "Rule number 3 - No violence towards others."

[Jennifer smiles]

Jo: "Rule number 4 - No swearing."

[Melissa rolls her eyes]

Jo: "And finally, rule number 5 - Always sit down at the table to eat."

Calm Down Zone
Jennifer: "MOMMY!"

Violet: "Melissa, leave your sister alone!"

Melissa: "Screw this, I'm going to Jessica's!"

Jo: *to Violet* "That behavior from Melissa right now is downright rude and that needs to change."

Dinnertime
Jo: "When Violet returned home from collecting Jennifer from school, she found Melissa and Diana eating Kentucky Fried Chicken and two cheeselovers pizzas from Pizza Hut."

Violet: "Where did you get this junk?"

Melissa: "We got it from KFC and Pizza Hut."

Violet: "How did you pay for all of this?"

Diana: "We ordered it via the phone and payed it on the credit card."

Jennifer: "They took your credit card out of your wallet from your purse!"

Jo: "All bets were off. Mom lost her cool."

[Violet suddenly loses it]

Diana's Parent-Teacher Conference
Jo: "Diana is on the edge of getting expelled from her second school for stealing, so Violet went to a parent-teacher conference."

Violet: "Ms. Barsi and Principal Carsley. How are you doing?"

[Violet shakes Ms. Barsi and Principal Carsley's hands]

Violet: "This is the lady who helped me discipline Diana. I'd like you to meet Jo Frost."

[Jo shakes Ms. Barsi and Principal Carsley's hands]

[Jo, Violet, Ms. Barsi and Principal Carsley sit around the table]

Violet: "So, what's this about? Has Diana been stealing again?"

Ms. Barsi: "Well, yes."

Violet: "What did she steal?"

Principal Carsley: "She stole snacks and sodas from the vending machine."

Ms. Barsi: "She also stole my iPad. She is also failing history."

Violet: "I just don't know what to do. I am just not cut out to be a mother. I tried disciplining them, but...they are just difficult. i tried everything. I just don't want Diana to throw away her future."

Thought Box
Jo: "I explained the Thought Box technique for Jennifer to share her personal opinions on her family."

Jo: "Jennifer, this is the Thought Box. You can write your own opinions on these little pieces of paper and insert them in the box. Who would you like to share your opinions on?"

Jennifer: "Melissa. She is a bully to me in my opinion. She is so naughty that it's driving me and mommy nuts! I wish I was on vacation without her and Diana!"

One day till Jennifer's Party
Violet: "What theme do you want to have this year?"

Jennifer: "I want a Bratz themed party this year."

Violet: "Great choice! I'll phone your teacher and the girls' mothers and tell them what theme you're having and then I'll go buy everything you need for your party tomorrow."

On the day of Jennifer's Party
[Jennifer is dressed in a Bratz Cat Costume]

Melissa: "Hey Jessica, can you come over to my house now?"

Melissa: "Hi Francis, honey! Can you come over to my house right now?"

Violet: "We had a mini-makeover, a fashion contest. Each girl was given some lip gloss, eye shadow, hair glitter, blush and body glitter. The girls got to make their own body glitter using fine polyester glitter and clear aloe Vera gel, mixing them together in a cosmetic jar for them to take home as a momento."

Jo: "And then, suddenly, Diana and Melissa's friends Jessica and Francis began to ruin Jennifer's party 10 minutes after it began."

Joanna: "NO, MY CAKE!"

Violet: "What's going on?"

Violet: "MELISSA SOPHIE BEAUREGARD!!!!!"

Violet: "DIANA FLORENCE BEAUREGARD!!!!!"

Melissa: "Let's spoil the fun! WE SHALL NOW HURT EM! MOVE IT!!!!"

[Melissa and Diana are armed with paintball guns]

[Jessica and Francis are armed with water guns]

Jennifer: "Melissa, Diana, what are you doing?"

[The party guests and their parents scream and run away to their cars]

Jennifer: "Wait, come back! The party's not over yet!"

Jo "MELISSA AND DIANA, GET BACK IN TO THE HOUSE RIGHT NOW AND GET YOUR CLOTHES ON!"

Violet: "As for you, Jessica and Francis, I will call your parents to take you home!"

[Jo and Violet drag Melissa and Diana back indoors and put them in the Calm Down Zone]

[Violet phones Jessica and Francis' parents to take them home]

[Jessica and Francis hastily put their clothes back on]

Violet: "START YOUR ESSAY, YOUNG LADIES!!!!!"

Violet: "DO IT NOW!!!!"

Party Aftermath
Jennifer: "I hate Melissa *sob* and Diana and their mean friends."

Violet: "I'll get your wet dress off and give you a nice hot bath and get you some hot chocolate, okay?"

[Later Violet is childing Melissa and Diana]

Violet: "I cannot believe you would go and spoil something I worked so hard on! Do you think we are wealthy enough to afford something special to be ruined? No! Now work on your 200 word essay based on the errors of your ways. I am going to go upstairs give your sister a bath right now."

[Violet carries Jennifer upstairs]

[Melissa and Diana reluctantly do as they are told and begin writing their essays and apology letters under Jo's supervision]

Diana: "This essay sucks."

[Melissa finds a photograph of their mother Violet when she was about 9 or 10, holding a golden ticket in her hand with a proud and smug look on her face. In the background, there are about hundreds of trophies in a trophy room.]

[Diana finds another photograph of their mother when she was 9, holding a 3-month-old piece of chewed gum]

(Melissa begins her essay while looking at the photograph: "Okay, where do we begin? I know I am not an honor roll student or a Girl Scout or a model citizen, and I am starting to get the feeling that you weren't either when you were a kid. The reason for not getting good marks in school or being a good daughter, for bullying little Jenny and being rude is because we have been following your footsteps, to become just like you. We want to become gum-chewing champions, and earn lots of trophies just like you did. And as for the errors of my ways, such as stealing, getting bad grades in school, causing so much trouble, swearing, underage drinking, getting into trouble with the law

Melissa and Diana vs. the Babysitter
Jo: "At home, the girls stayed home with a young babysitter named Charlotte Dumais while Violet was going to meet a man she'd met on an online dating service."

Violet: "I would like to introduce you to some new things that Jo has given me."

Charlotte: "Okay. What are they? I'll have to write them down in my babysitting notebook."

Violet: "Okay, Charlotte, if Melissa and Diana misbehave, give them a warning and if they carry on, you will put them in the Calm Down Zone."

Charlotte: "Where's the Calm Down Zone?"

[Violet shows Charlotte the Calm Down Zone]

Violet: "Melissa will stay in here for 16 minutes and Diana, 12 minutes."

[Charlotte writes down all the information in her babysitting notebook]

Violet: "Now, Dinner Time is at 4:00pm, Diana's Homework Time is at 6:00pm, Jennifer's bathtime is at 8:00pm and her bedtime is at 9.00pm and both Melissa and Diana will have to be in bed at 9:30pm."

[Violet hands Charlotte a long list of emergency numbers]

Violet: "And here's a list of everything else."

Melissa: "It's not fair, I'm not a little kid anymore, Mom!"

Dining Out
Jo: " "

Violet: "So Jenny, what would you like to have?"

Jennifer: "Let me see...macaroni and cheese with fruit salad."

DVD Meeting
Jo: you need to tell your daughters the truth. They found old photographs of you when you were a child, and that photo of you had a smug look on your face. Maybe that is where Diana and Melissa is picking up disrespect and rude behavior.

Reinforcements
Violet: "Diana and Melissa, we need to talk."

[Melissa and Diana sit in front of their mother]

Violet: "You too, Jenny."

[Jennifer comes into the living room]

Violet: "I made some very bad choices when I was a child; I was rude and disrespectful to other kids, I disobeyed authority, and I was also mean, but this does not mean that you should too. Please, don't make the same mistakes I did. It lead to unpleasant consequences for me."

Family Update
Violet: "After Jo was gone, I think that we are now a happy family. "