Thread:GoCommitDi/@comment-26181419-20190930001646/@comment-2081368-20190930104534

I still remember my father saying this, he was acting like he doesn't love me at all, more like a spoiled brat...

"YOU HAVE TO DO WHAT IS THE UNINTELLIGIBLE, AND YOUR MOTHER'S DEAD, AND SHE'S NOT GONNA COME BACK TO EARTH, YOU HAVE TO LIVE WITH IT!!!"

And this quote keeps appearing in my mind every day, every hour, and then I decide not to make an effort to try to survive, as I do not want to live anymore.

Before that, I was very tough about coping with her dying, and my father didn't even like that I was tough. And then I cried so much after he said, "I'll beat the shit out of you, call the cops, they'll take you to jail", and was shoving me.

On the way to the second day of the funeral, Angelica thought I was trying to cry, I was actually trying not to cry. And all Laura did was say, it's either his house (which is the worst in the world, I'm fed up with the people who say otherwise, but don't worry, I'll move out in possibly a month and a half or less, the rest of the family seems to doubt it) or the street.

I also feel very lucky to be alive today. My mother said she almost died when she was almost dead, and I said I was almost dead when I almost died. Laura said I did not almost die, but what the family says are plots that are universally hated SpongeBob episodes insane (i.e. Pet Sitter Pat, A Pal For Gary, Restraining SpongeBob, Stuck in the Wringer, I could go on and on, easily by starting with Good Neighbors).