Fred Lemmy's 11th Birthday

Before the Party
Audrey: Tomorrow is Fred's 11th birthday. In this birthday, we will be hosting a Beatles-themed party.

Asuka: This is, like, the third party in a row he has it Beatles-themed! Why not a Rock-a-Doodle-themed party or something?

Lucas: We are not having a Rock-a-Doodle-themed party because that movie was heavily panned by critics and is considered one of the worst films in Don Bluth's filmography.

Audrey: This party will be even bigger than the previous ones. We expect you kids to behave.

Party
[We see many parents and Fred's friends arrive at the house]

Fred: Welcome to my party! Jacob, you got me a huge present!

Jacob: Yep. In fact, we bought you some really good presents!

Fred: Thanks! Come on it.

[The house and garden is decorated in a Beatles theme. Beatles music is also playing]

Drake: Wow. Mom and dad must've took out a huge loan for this party.

Asuka: If only they made it themed from the 1973 movie "The Exorcist".

Drake: You're way too young to be seeing that movie.

Asuka: Just like how you're too young to visit the strip club!

Audrey: Okay, kids! Are you ready for the main attraction?!

Kids: YEAH!!!

Lucas: Alright! Here is our special guest!

[In comes a mock-up of the Beatles]

Fred: (shrieking) OH MY GOD!!! IT'S THE BEATLES!!!

John: Hello there, Fred!

George: We heard it was your birthday!

Paul: So we decided to preform for your birthday!

Ringo: Hope you enjoy our concert!

Fred: THIS IS AWESOME!!! CAN YOU PLEASE PLAY "HERE COMES THE SUN"?!?!

Paul: Why sure!

[The mock-up band performs "Here Comes the Sun"]

Drake: Wow, they're actually really good at the cover.

Asuka: They're not even real! And last time I checked, John Lennon and George Harrison were dead! I can't believe Fred is too much of a wanker to believe that that's really them!

Drake: Well it's his birthday. Don't ruin this for him.

[After the concert, it was time to blow out the candles. The birthday cake is the album cover to "Meet the Beatles!"]

Lucas: Alright, everyone. Let's sing Happy Birthday to Fred!

Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you Happy birthday, dear Fred Happy birthday to you Audrey: Yay, Fred! Blow out those candles!

[Fred blows out the candles]

Everyone: HOORAY!!!

[Suddenly, Asuka splashes the cake with the water hose]

Fred: ASUKA NO!!!

Audrey: Why would you do that?!

Asuka: THAT CAKE WAS ASS!!!

[Asuka then hacks the speakers and plays Cock and Ball Torture's "Sadochismo" album]

Lucas: BLOODY HELL, ASUKA, YOU HAVE TO PLAY YOUR FUCKING PORNOGRIND HERE?!?!

John: We don't like pornogrind at all.

Asuka: SHUT THE FUCK UP, MR. I BEAT MY WIFE AND PRETEND I CARE ABOUT PEACE WHEN I'M ACTUALLY AN OVERRATED MUSICIAN WHO'S ONLY GOOD AT SUCKING DICKS FOR A LIVING!!!

Ringo: Hey! That's no way to talk to people, young lady.

Asuka: OH DON'T ACT LIKE YOU CAN TELL PEOPLE WHAT TO DO!!! NOBODY GIVES A SHIT ABOUT RINGO ANYWAY!!! AND YOU OUTLIVE JOHN AND GEORGE BECAUSE JOHN LENNON GOT RIGHTFULLY KILLED WHILE GEORGE HARRISON DIED FROM LUNG CANCER!!! I HOPE HE SUFFERED A LONG, PAINFUL DEATH!!!

[Audrey unplugs the speakers, turning off the music]

Audrey: Asuka, you are not going to be ruining the cake and disrespecting the Beatles like that! You better apologize right now!

Asuka: Apologize for what? Fred doesn't deserve this party!

Lucas: In that case, you can take your butt to your room right now!

Asuka: GOOD!!! FUCK YOU ALL!!!

[Asuka storms inside]

Jacob: Geez, Fred. You have a horrible little sister.

Fred: I know. My parents are planning on getting Nanny 911 here so they can solve this.

Lucas: We're so sorry about this.

Paul: You don't need to apologize. We've been called worse before.

Jacob: Good thing we brought a spare cake just in case the other one was smashed.

Audrey: Thanks, Jacob. Now let's open the presents.

[Fred opens his presents to find multiple Beatles memorabilia, a new vinyl player, VHS and DVD copies to Beatles movies and documentaries, more posters on the Beatles, and shirts on the Beatles albums]

Fred: Wow. Thank you so much for these presents. They're awesome!

Lucas: Now why don't we watch a movie? I bought a huge projector with some of the best speakers ever. We will watch the 1968 movie "Yellow Submarine".

Fred: YEAH!!! Let's watch it!

[Everyone gathers around the projector as Lucas puts on the movie]

[The intro starts playing]

[20 minutes into the film...]

Asuka: I can't believe they're watching Yellow Submarine! That movie is so overrated! That's it! I will hack the projector and put on a much better movie!

[Asuka hijacks the projector and shuts off the movie]

Audrey: What happened?

[The projector then puts on the 1984 TV-movie "The Burning Bed"]

[We are shown a scene where Francine is being abused by her husband]

Fred: OH MY GOD!!! THAT IS SO AWFUL!!!

George: Turn off this rubbish!

Lucas: I can't! Someone is hijacking the projector!

[Asuka then shatters a windows and then gets a megaphone]

Asuka: (on the megaphone) WE ARE NOT WATCHING YELLOW SUBMARINE BECAUSE THAT MOVIE IS SO OVERRATED!!! WE WILL BE WATCHING THE 1984 TV-MOVIE "THE BURNING BED" INSTEAD!!!

Audrey: YOUNG LADY, WE ARE NOT WATCHING THE BURNING BED BECAUSE THAT FILM IS OFFENSIVE TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE VICTIMS!!! NOW PUT IT BACK TO YELLOW SUBMARINE RIGHT NOW!!!

Asuka: NEVER!!!

[Asuka then throws two cherry bombs at the presents and cake. They explode and destroy the presents and cake]

Fred: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOT MY PRESENTS AND CAKE!!!

Lucas: STOP THIS SHIT RIGHT NOW!!! YOU WILL NOT BE RUINING THIS PARTY!!!

Asuka: IT'S TOO LATE NOW!!!

[Asuka then throws tomatoes, pies, dishes, eggs, jell-o, blood, smoothies, milk, soda, and many more foods and drinks at everyone below]

Drake: JESUS CHRIST, ASUKA!!! THIS HAS GONE WAY TOO FAR!!!

Ringo: We gotta get outta here!

John: I agree! Let's leave!

[The mock-up band leaves]

Jacob: We're leaving too! Asuka has gone mad!

[Jacob and his friends leave as well]

Fred: ASUKA YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!! YOU DROVE AWAY THE BEATLES AND MY FRIENDS BECAUSE OF YOUR CRAZY ASS!!!

Asuka: I DON'T CARE!!! FUCK YOUR BLOODY BIRTHDAY PARTY!!!

[Asuka finishes off the disaster by throwing a huge cherry bomb at the projector. It explodes and completely obliterates the projector]

Asuka: GET REKT!!! DON'T MESS WITH ME!!!

Aftermath
Audrey: WE CANNOT BELIEVE THAT YOU RUINED FRED'S 11TH BIRTHDAY!!! NOW HE IS HEARTBROKEN BECAUSE OF YOU!!!

Lucas: WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?!?!

Asuka: All I gotta say is... FUCK FRED!!! HE DESERVES NOTHING AFTER ALL THE SHIT HE HAS DONE!!! THAT BLOODY FUCKING WANKER DESERVES TO HAVE HIS BIRTHDAY PARTY RUINED!!! I AM THE BOSS OF THIS HOUSE, AND HE BETTER REMEMBER THAT FOR THE ENTIRETY OF HIS SHITTY LIFETIME!!!

[Lucas snaps, as he pulls down Asuka's pants and spanks her exposes butt really hard]

Asuka: OW OW OW OW OW!!! STOP IT!!! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?!?!

Lucas: THIS IS FOR MAKING EVERYONE'S DAY SHIT!!!

Audrey: NOW GO UPSTAIRS TO YOUR ROOM AND GO TO BED RIGHT NOW!!!

[Asuka runs straight to her room crying, then slams the door shut really hard]