Attack of the Mombie/Transcript

No, I am not giving you my manga because you think it’s a kids’ series.
[We see Satsuki reading her JoJonium JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: Phantom Blood Volume 2 Japanese edition while having Volume 1 Japanese edition on her lap with Michael McNamara in a waiting area in the base]

Maverick: “Mommy, I wanna read the lady’s comic, I’m bored.”

[Maverick’s mother walks over to Satsuki and Michael]

Portia: “My son wants your comic book.”

Satsuki: “Uh, This one’s not for small children, This contains graphic violence and content not to be viewed by kids, If Viz are to be believed, JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure’s a Teen Plus, which means 16 or over only, I cannot give it to your kid.”

Portia: “But my son gets bored with his iPad and comics easily, can he just read it?”

Satsuki: “This series is NOT for children, The scenes are inappopriate for children.”

Portia: “JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure sounds like a children’s series, so it must be a kid’s comic, Give it to my son right now! What kind of adult reads kid’s comics?!”

Satsuki: “No!, It’s not for children!”

Portia: “Then why is manga like Dragon Ball made by the same company?!”

Satsuki: “Don’t give me that excuse! The stuff in this would give Dragon Ball a run for it’s money!”

Portia: "Are you sure?"

Satsuki: “Yes, this is not for kids!”

[Maverick starts pouting]

Portia: "Great, you made my son upset."

Satsuki: "I'm still not giving it to your son because he's too young for this."

[Maverick starts whimpering]

Michael: “Stop it, kid, just listen to her, I don’t like whining kids.”

[Michael turns to Portia]

Michael: “Learn to tell your kid the word “no”, This is why my kids aren’t spoiled brats, What kind of mom would demand someone to give their manga made for older teenagers and adults to your kid?”

Satsuki: “Yeah, Definitely not.”

Portia: "I can't have my son this easily bored!"

Satsuki: “You know, I have a daughter and she knows full damn well to stay away from the explicit stuff.”

Maverick: “Mommy! I want the comic now!”

[Maria comes to the waiting area with her Dragon Ball Volume 5 and sits on Michael’s lap]

Maria: “Hi, Mom.”

Portia: “Are you this woman’s little girl?”

Maria: “Hai, what appears to be the trouble?”

Portia: “Tell her to stop being so selfish and give my Maverick her comic book.”

Maria: “No.”

Portia: “What do you mean now?!”

Maria: “JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure is not for children, how old is Maverick?”

Portia: “6.”

Maria: “What kind of mother would give her son an extremely violent manga to read?”

Portia: “Well, excuse me! Your mother is reading a kid’s comic!”

Maria: “You’re kidding me.....”

[Maverick starts bawling and throwing a tantrum]

Maverick: “I WANT THE LADY’S COMIC BOOK NOOOOOOOW!”

Portia: “You are so selfish! It’s rude to read comics infront of children and not allow them to read!”

[Reicheru and Martin see the commotion and walk over]

Martin: “Excuse me, will you please stop pestering my wife?”

Portia: “That lady stole my son’s comic book!”

Martin: “Her father brought her those, You know about ghosts, right?”

Portia: “Yes, We see them here!”

Martin: “The Volume 1 of it is very special to her, Her father wrapped it in plastic film before he committed suicide by slicing his neck.”

Portia: “I don’t care if the comic isn’t for kids! I want it now!”

[Mikey and Ichiro see the commotion and Mikey walks over]

Portia: “Oh, a WWII American ghost, this Japanese woman stole my son’s“

Mikey: “Get the fuck away from my daughter-in-law this instant, Those manga are hers.”

Portia: “This Jap’s your daughter-in-law?!”

Mikey: “Yeah, That’s right.....”

Ichiro: “Mikey, get him to shut up!”

[Mikey looks at Maverick throwing a tantrum, then protectively wraps his arms around Satsuki]

Mikey: “Tell you kid “no”.....”

Portia: “No way, my precious little angel wants something, He will have it, he gets bored with his iPad easily.”

Maria: “Owning an iPad at his age?!”

Portia: “Do you have a problem with it?!”

Maria: “Kids back in the 1980’s played outside, I had a Famicom, I wasn’t allowed beyond my neighbor’s home aswell as my own in my final months, they went after my mom aswell.”

Portia: “Why doesn’t your mom buy your one, I’ll give you a fresh new iPad for free if your mom hands her comic book over!”

Maria: “What will I get out of it?”

Portia: “A brand new iPad and the feeling you get when you see a child smile at a brand new comic book!”

Maria: “No way! I’d rather play most modern consoles than own a tablet! This book belongs to her, so go away!”

[Reicheru walks up to Portia]

Reicheru: “Ma’am, This manga is Satsuki’s, I would advise you to stop pestering Satsuki.”

[Portia then snatched the manga off Satsuki’s hands then hands it to Maverick]

Portia: “Here you go my precious angel, a new comic book.”

Maverick: “Yay!”

[Portia then gets out an unopened iPad]

Portia: “And a free iPad, thank you for your cooperation.”

Maria: “Give that back!”

[Maria stands up and snatches it back then throws the unopened iPad back, handing the manga back to her mother]

Maria: “Leave us alone! I don’t want a fucking iPad, I want to read manga!”

Portia: “Who taught you such disgraceful language?, do you have a problem?!”

Maria: “Hai, I have a problem with you! Face it, I am not sacrificing my mother’s ownership of her manga for a damn electronic!”

[Sophie and Ri Dae-Jung comes up]

Ri Dae-Jung: “” (Translation: All right everyone, you can start by calming the fuck down!)

Portia: “That bitch stole my comic book!”

Satsuki: “Sophie, don’t listen to her, she stole it off me!”

Portia: “My son paid for that comic with his own money!”

Satsuki: “Your kid is too damn young to read this stuff!”

[Ri Dae-Jung pulls a blank-shooting pistol out and fires it, silencing both women]

Maverick: “But mommy said I could have it!”

Ri Dae-Jung: “” (Translation: The fuck did I just say?, shut the fuck up)

Satsuki: “Sophie, go explain to that kid that JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure is NOT for children.”

Portia: “But the title is definitely a kid’s series.....”

Satsuki: “It’s not.”

Sophie: “Okay....”

Maria: “The kid’s name is Maverick.”

[Sophie comes up to Maverick]

Sophie: “Okay, Maverick, The lady’s manga, JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure is not for kids, It has large amounts of violence and gore, some nudity, mature themes such as animal death.”

Maverick: “I don’t care, I want the lady’s comic now! My mommy buys and gets me anything I want!”

Sophie: "Listen, why don't you try reading things that are for your age?"

Maverick: “I wanna read the lady’s comic.”

Sophie: "It's certainly not for your age, though. There are still plenty of comics that are for kids. Mind if I take you to a book store in a suburban Supernannya town?"

Maverick: “My mommy said I could have it.”

Michael: “Kid, just piss off.”

Sophie: "Let's go to town and find an appropriate comic book or manga for you. Catherine, you can come along."

Catherine: "Alright, Sophie."

Maverick: “I am not moving until that lady gives me it, my mommy said I could have it!”

Portia: “Most comics are too expensive nowadays and I can’t afford them and my precious angel gets bored with his iPad really easily, That woman is going to give me hers whenever she likes it or not!”

Maverick: “Yeah, when my mommy says I can have it, It’s mine to keep!”

Sophie: "I'm sure Catherine has enough money to buy one. Maverick, time to go."

Satsuki: (whispering) “” (Translation: Maria, Don’t tell them you read JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure....)

[Maria nods]

Satsuki: “You cannot afford a $19 dollar comic book, but you gave your failed abortion a $500 tablet? You’re such a pennypincher”

[The male members of the Kimmings-McNamara-Tachimi family chuckle]

Michael: “Heh, failed abortion, Good one Satsuki.”

Portia: “Just for that, Give me it, This will save me alot of money if you give me it.”

Satsuki: "Nope."

Reicheru: “Ma’am, I think you need to leave.”

Portia: "Why should I?"

Sophie: (as she and Catherine continue taking Maverick away) "Look around you. Is everyone else happy? Fuck no!" (to Maverick) "Come on."

[Maverick screams and bawls and Portia then snatches him off the two]

Portia: “No, you are not taking him anywhere, Comic books are too expensive and she should give it to me because I am a single mom! Anything Maverick wants, he will get it! The comic book shop is too far away and will exhaust my little boy!”

Satsuki: “I’m a damn mother myself! Maria likes Shonen Jump aswell, bur it’s mostly the kid-friendly titles she reads!”

Portia: “It’s so rude to read comics infront of kids and not offer them to read it! Comics are for kids!”

Satsuki: “Didn’t you hear what Sophie said!”

Michael: “Portia, Just piss off.”

Portia: “No, She will give me it.”

Satsuki: “I’m not giving you this.”

Portia: “You should give it to me, My little boy deserves it more than you.”

Satsuki: “Get the fuck out of here, Bratleigh isn’t special.”

Portia: "Oh yeah? Comics are for kids, and kids only!"

Sophie: "Really? That's like saying cartoons should be only for kids. There are adult cartoons that exist, you know. I can name 15 off the top of my head."

Portia: “Cartoons and comics are for kids only, adult animation shouldn’t exist.”

Sophie: "The Simpsons, Family Guy, South Park, American Dad!, Futurama, Rick and Morty, Robot Chicken, BoJack Horseman, Bob's Burgers, Drawn Together, F is For Family, King of the Hill, Archer, the Netflix Castlevania series, Final Space...As a matter of fact, I could go on all day."

Michael: “F is for Family.....Heh, I like Bill Burr.......I will put you through that fucking wall!”

Portia: “Those cartoons should be banned, Cartoons are supposed to be for kids.”

Sophie: "Want examples of adult animation from the 1970s or earlier? There's Watership Down, Down and Dirty Duck, Wait Till Your Father Gets Home, Fritz the Cat, Where's Huddles?, Mickey Mouse in Vietnam, Escalation, Bambi Meets Godzilla, Heaven and Earth Magic, Animal Farm, and the multitude of pre-Hays Code animated shorts filled with suggestive themes."

Portia: “Just give my son the comic book, Comics are supposed to be for kids.”

Mikey: “Lady, You have no idea how comics in Japan are made.”

Portia: “But my son wants a Shonen Jump title.”

Mikey: “Shonen Jump doesn’t mean it’s for kids, The main villain has fucked girls, Killed many people, He even kicks and burns a dog and one of his henchmen even kicked a fucking dog to death.”

[Satsuki turns to Maria]

Satsuki: “” (Translation: DIO’s fucked them off screen, He’s not lying about the Vanilla Ice part)

Maria: “” (Translation: What kind of mother allows her kid at that age to read Shonen Jump titles?)

Ri Dae-Jung: “” (Translation: Hey, Mikey, this reminds me when me and Marie went on a ferry, I brought JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure DVDs so me and her could watch them together and this lady wanted us to change it because her kid could see it and demanded we put on Paw Patrol)

No, You cannot go into my quarantine room and play on my Switch
[We see Ryu playing on his Nintendo Switch, he is playing Super Dragon Ball Heroes: World Mission on it with Maria watching him]

Ryu: “It was nice for you to watch me, Maria-chan.”

Maria: “Yeah, Can we play Pokémon after this?”

[They both hear a knock]

Portia: “Hey, can my son come in here and play on your Switch?”

Maria: “Portia, Listen, you don’t understand, Ryu himself has virtually no immune system due to organ damage, Even the common cold can kill him, We can’t.”

Maverick: “Mommy! I wanna play on the Switch!”

Portia: “If this is the daughter of the selfish woman who wouldn’t let my son have her comic, Give us the Nintendo Switch to make up for it!”