Langbroek Family 2010 Christmas

December 1
[Alicia introduces the kids and grandchild to the elf on the shelf, Avalanche who just arrived with a naughty list with the triplets' names on it and the nice list with the rest of the kids' names on it]

Alicia: "Kids, this is Avalanche the Elf on the Shelf."

December 8: The Triplets' 3rd birthday party
[In the morning we find Avalanche the Elf on the Shelf asleep on the mantel between stockings]

[The triplets are placed in their booster seats and presented 3 Handy Manny cupcakes]

Everyone (singing): "Happy birthday to you..."

Teddy: "STOOOOOOOOOP!"

Everyone (singing): "Happy birthday...."

Teddy: "SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!"

Sherman: "I HATE BEING SUNG TO!!!!!"

Teddy: "ME TOO!!!!!"

Bryce: "ME THREE!!!!!!!"

Alicia: "Why? Is it too overcrowding for you, dears?"

Teddy, Sherman, and Bryce: "WE WANNA WATCH HANDY MANNY!!!!!!!"

Alicia: "You can watch your favorite show tomorrow; right now, you three need to blow out your candles, and then you need to stay with us for the rest of your party."

[Teddy, Sherman, and Bryce put out the candles with their fingers]

Kristin: "Boys, NO! DIDN'T YOU SEE THAT FIRE?!?!? That is dangerous! YOU COULD'VE HURT YOURSELF!!!!!"

Teddy: "BIRTHDAYS SUCK!!!!!!"

[The triplets destroy their cupcakes]

Kristin: "Wait, I thought you three liked chocolate marble. Are those chocolate marble cupcakes not good enough for you? We made your favorites and invited your little friends and cousins. We set up your favorite games. Don't you like lemonade?"

[Sherman pops the balloons]

[Bryce throws lemonade at Vivian]

Vivian: "Another year of being bullied by the triplets, it is just unacceptable, daddy."

Uncle Hyman: "I know, Vivian, will the boys ever behave?"

[Teddy opens the presents to reveal clothes, LeapFrog toys, sweaters, Barney plushes, a Disney Store gift card, some books, crayons, Christmas coloring books, a guitar, Rolie Polie Olie DVDs, Little People toys, a Ouaps Hide and Seek Jojo bunny, a Ouaps Follow Me Max, a Ouaps Max My First Dog, a Ouaps Jojo's Bump Bump, a Ouaps Jojo Bunny Buggy much to his disappointment and throws them away, cause it's boring trash]

Sherman: "WE DIDN'T ASK FOR TRASH!!!!!"

Teddy: "WE ASKED FOR HANDY MANNY STUFF!!!!!!"

Uncle Hyman: "Wait! You can buy Handy Manny toys with the Disney Store gift card, buddy. It has money in that gift card. I thought you also liked Barney, Rolie Polie Olie and Jojo and Friends."

Kristin: "Well, why don't you ask Santa Claus instead? You can write to him and tell him what you want."

Alicia: "We looked in every store for Handy Manny toys, dears, but they were all out. I am sorry. You can ask Santa to bring you those toys."

Bryce: "SO SCREW YOU LOSERS, WE'RE GOING UPSTAIRS!!!!!! Come on, guys!"

[The triplets go upstairs to watch Handy Manny Christmas Special but to their surprise, they find the Elf on the Shelf, Avalanche with a sign, "Happy birthday Teddy, Sherman and Bryce! Better be good to your family or I'm outta here!" and another sign reading, "Elf on strike! Swearing, stealing, hurting your baby niece and attacking your family makes me sad... I will not work when your behavior is bad!!!"]

Sherman: "Hey, Teddy."

Teddy: "What?"

Sherman: "What did Kristin mean when she said 'ask Santa Claus instead'?"

Bryce: "Kids write to him... ask for something what they want for Christmas..."

Teddy: "Wait a minute!!!! Mommy did say 'ask Santa to bring you those toys'. Aha! Write to Santa Claus!"

[They come downstairs back to the party, fish the crayons out of the trash bin and get three pieces of paper from Sergei's office]

Manu: "Ah, glad you changed your minds and decided to stay."

Time to Open Presents
[The Langbroeks are at Aunt Jillian's house for the holidays]

[Kristin looks into her stocking to find Ice Cream of the Month Club, apple dumpling candles, some candy canes, a few pens, and a friendship bracelet]

[Kristin opens up her presents to reveal an iPhone, a bakery gift certificate, caramel apple making kit, vanilla ice cream scented candle, a Nintendo Wii, an ice cream maker, a Best Buy gift card, and an iPod touch]

Kristin: "Cool! I love those presents!"

[Shelby looks into her stocking to find a gift card to Build-a-Bear Workshop, a Baby Einstein Shapes and Numbers discovery cards, a Pudsey bear, a Snoopy plush doll, a Sock Monkey, and Brainy Baby Music flashcards]

[Shelby opens up her presents to reveal a Children in Need Blush Bear, a pink bunny rabbit plush, some Baby Einstein DVDs, a Ouaps Jojo Bunny Buggy and a Pat the Bunny book]

[Leanne looks into her stocking to find a gift card to The Cheesecake Factory, a gift card collection to Nordstrom, stress balls, a gift card to Amazon.com, a gift card to Rainforest Cafe and an Art of Appreciation Gift Baskets So Serene Spa Bath, and Body set]

[Leanne opens up her presents to reveal a scrapbook kit, a The Simpsons Movie DVD, a Diary of a Wimpy Kid book, and a Nintendo DS Lite]

Leanne: "Alright! That is terrific!"

[Helen looks into her stocking to find a gift card to Starbucks, a personalized ice cream bowl, a few pieces of fudge, some candy canes, a few pens, a gift card to Wal-Mart, a McDonald's gift certificate, an eyeliner and some lip gloss]

[Helen opens up her presents to reveal a Apollo 18 DVD, a Twilight book, and several Scary Movie DVDs]

Helen: "Wow!"

[Haley looks into her stocking to find an iTunes gift card, an Azelf plush doll, a Uxie plush doll, a Mesprit plush doll, a gift card to Build-a-Bear Workshop, some candy canes, a pair of earphones, and a gift card to GameStop]

[Haley opens up her presents to reveal an iPod Nano, a Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa DVD, and a joke book]

Haley: "Amazing!"

[Bridie looks into his stocking to find a Charizard plush doll, a new watch, some candy canes, a couple of pens, a gift card to Michaels, and some peppermint bark]

[Bridie opens up his presents to reveal a Pikachu plush, Pokemon Diamond, A ''Bakugan: Battle Brawlers Vol 1. DVD, and an Ed Edd n' Eddy Vol. 2: Fools Par-Ed-Ise ''DVD]

Bridie: "COOL!"

[Manu looks into her stocking to find an expensive watch, a diamond tennis bracelet in 18k white gold, a pair of freshwater pearl and diamond earrings in 14k white gold, a 14k white gold pearl necklace, a diamond necklace, a diamond engagement ring, a golden bracelet, and a pair of Tahitian Cultured Pearl earrings in 18k white gold]

[Manu opens up her presents to reveal a set of diamonds, fancy jewelry, and expensive earrings]

Manu: "Pretty!"

[Leighton looks into her stocking to find a Diego doll, a gift card to Baskin Robbins, some Crayola markers, a gift card to Toys R Us, a gift card to Build-a-Bear Workshop, some Legos, a Big Bird doll, some candy canes, and some Crayola crayons]

[Leighton opens up her presents to reveal an Elmo doll, a Dora the Explorer doll, and a Disney Princess coloring book]

Leighton: "Hooray!"

[Teddy, Bryce, and Sherman open up their presents to reveal notes that read "Teddy, Bryce, and Sherman, Avalance the Elf told me that you boys were all very, very naughty this year. You got kicked out of daycares, said bad words, tortured your mommy and daddy, refused to clean your room, tried to open presents early, misbehaved in preschool, attacked your family members, terrorized your niece Shelby, stole a lot of goods from the stores, and did a lot of bad things. Better luck next year. Signed, Santa" in cursive]

Teddy: "SANTA IS SHIT!"

Sherman: "SANTA IS POO-POO!"

Bryce: "SANTA IS A FAT QUEER!"

[Teddy, Bryce, and Sherman look into their stockings to find nothing but big, fat, dirty lumps of coal]

Teddy: "Oh fuck..."

Sherman: "Oh fucking shit..."

Bryce: "We got coal..."

[Alicia steps into the room]

Teddy, Bryce, and Sherman: "WE HATE SANTA ONCE AND FOR ALL!"

Alicia: "For being naughty this year, you lost Handy Manny for the rest of the year!"

Teddy: (screeching) "WE WANNA WATCH HAANNDDDY MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNYYYYYYYYY, you evil fat witch!"

Alicia: "TOO FUCKING BAD!"

Teddy: "YOU ALWAYS FAVOR EVERYONE ELSE IN THIS FAMILY! YOU LIKE THEM WAY MORE THAN US!"

Alicia: "That's because they are nice and polite, unlike you three."

[Sherman pees in his pants]

Bryce: "We want to hurt our brothers and sisters because they got presents and not us!"

Sherman: "Yeah, LET'S HURT THEM!"

Teddy: "AND KILL THEM! This family stinks!"

[Teddy, Bryce, and Sherman throw a few books at their siblings and then throw a cookbook at the Christmas tree, causing it to fall over on Bridie's head]

Bridie: "Mom, GET ME OUT OF HERE!"

Alicia: "Right, Handy Manny is gone for two weeks once we get home."

[The cousins, Nicholas, Peter, Clara, Sophie, Kayla, Cindy and Jessie arrive along with Aunt Coraline and Uncle Ernest]

[Alicia helps Bridie]

Alicia: "Are you hurt, son?"

Bridie: "Just a scratch, mommy."

The Missing Presents
[Aunty Jillian and Uncle Hyman's children Tom, Ryan, Vivian, Sandra, Mario and Doug wake up and run downstairs]

Cousin Peter: "My presents are missing, Aunty Alicia!"

Alicia: "Where are they, then?"

Cousin Peter: "I don't know. They were under the tree."

Alicia: "Well, let's go find them."

Cousin Sophie: "Aunty Alica! My presents are all gone!"

Cousin Jessie: "Oh no, my presents are gone too!"

Alicia: "Where was the last place you saw them?"

Cousin Jessie: "Under the tree, Aunty Alicia."

Cousin Cindy: "My presents, they're all gone too!"

Cousin Nicholas: "Oh no, mine are gone too!"

Cousin Kayla: "Where are my presents?"

Cousin Clara: "I can't find my presents anywhere."

Cousin Ryan: "I think the Grinch probably stole them! And mine are stolen too!"

Cousin Mario: "So are mine!"

Cousin Sandra: "Mommy, Aunty Alicia, Aunty Coraline, I can't find my presents."

Cousin Vivian: "Me too!"

Aunty Jillian: "Where did you last see them, girls?"

Cousin Vivian: "We last saw them underneath the Christmas tree, mommy."

Cousin Tom: "I lost my presents!"

Cousin Doug: "Somebody stole my presents too!"

Cousin Tom: "Will you help us find them?"

Alicia: "I'll help you find them."

Cousin Peter: "Yeah, let's go find them!"

[Serghei arrives in the room]

Serghei: "What's going on in here?"

Alicia: "Someone took the kids' presents."

Cousin Tom: "Will you help us find them, Uncle Serghei?"

Serghei: "Yes, I will."

[Cousin Nicholas notices some missing presents and the triplets]

Cousin Nicholas: "Look!"

Serghei: "A-ha!"

Dinner
[On the table, there is Christmas Caipirinhas, chocolate-coffee gingerbread with hazelnut poached pears, Chile-roasted almonds, nut brittle, piquillo pepper cheese crostini, potato-mushroom gratin, brocollini with pecan brown butter, sherry vinegar and molasses glazed carrots, roasted butter nut squash and apple salad, cheddar and chive Yorkshire puddings, and standing rib roast, spinach-porcini stuffing, Irish whiskey gravy, and horseradish cream]

Aunty Jillian: "Dinner's ready!"

Serghei: "Good news, we found the missing presents."