Iconic-Todaro Family 2031 Christmas

Time to Open Presents
Nicole: "At Grandma Desiree's house, it was Christmas and the family was opening presents."

[The family wakes up bright and early at Grandma Desiree's to open presents]

Paula: "Kids, time to open presents!"

[The family runs downstairs to the living room with a Christmas tree]

[Rico opens up his presents]

Rico: "This is great! I got a Squacky the Duck plush, a Pudsey Bear, lotsa candy, a Pikachu doll, a Bugs Bunny doll, a stash of candy, a Pajanimals coloring book, and so much money!"

[Lucy opens up her presents]

Lucy: "What is this? Wow! I've got "

[Rico looks inside his stocking]

Rico: "Yahoo! I got a few Rolie Polie Olie books, an Olie the Robot plush, a Rolie Polie Olie: The Great Defender of Fun DVD, and a gift card to Toys R Us!"

[Rico smiles happily]

Rico: "This is the best Christmas ever!"

[Lucy looks inside her stocking]

Lucy: "Ooh, peppermint bark, some pens, a notepad, chocolate coins, a Flyleaf CD, candy canes, Hershey's kisses, Gummi Christmas trees, candy cane Christmas trees, a Best Buy gift card, a Subway gift card, bath salts, a bath fizzy, some lip gloss, jelly beans, some money, a chocolate Santa, a milk chocolate nutcracker and a Forever 21 gift card!"

[Imogen, Marisa, Myles and Corey hurry over to their stockings and find nothing but big, fat, dirty lumps of coal]

Imogen: "We got coal..."

Corey: "This is all dad's fault!"

Myles: "I swear I will kill dad!"

Marisa: "At least we still got presents. I hope I get a lipstick box."

[Marisa opens her present to reveal a note that reads "Marisa, you have been anything but good this year. You showed a complete lack of respect for authority, shoplifted from stores, tortured your brother Rico, told lies to your mother, cheated on your school test, got bad grades in school, got several after school detentions and you even destroyed public property. Signed, Santa." in cursive]

Marisa: "Aw, phooey..."

Imogen: "I hope I get a Nintendo Wii U."

[Imogen opens her present to reveal a note that reads "Imogen, you have been very naughty this year. You shoplifted from countless stores, bullied other children and stole money from the collection plate at church. Signed, Santa." in cursive]

Imogen: "Ugh."

Myles: "I hope I get a paintball gun and a Grand Theft Auto V game."

[Myles opens his present to reveal a note that reads "Myles, your behavior this year was very bad. You showed a complete lack of respect for authority. Signed, Santa." in cursive]

Myles: "He has got to be kidding me."

Corey: "I hope I get an XBOX 360."

[Corey opens his present to reveal a note that reads "Corey, this year you were very naughty. You stole a neighbor's motorcycle and took it for a joyride. Signed, Santa." in cursive]

Corey: "Grrrr..."

Marisa: "You know what, guys? LET'S GET REVENGE ON DAD!!!!"

Imogen: "HE'S A (bleep)!"

Myles: "HE'S SO GOING TO GET IT!!!!"

Corey: "LET'S ALL KILL DAD! WE ALL HATE CHRISTMAS! BAH, HUMBUG!"

Marisa, Imogen, Myles and Corey: "CHHAAARRRRGGGGGEEEEEE!!!!!!!"

[Marisa gathers weapons, such as a kitchen knife, a cigarette lighter, a plastic bag, etc.]

Marisa, Imogen, Myles and Corey Get Revenge on Giuseppe
[Marisa, Imogen, Myles and Corey scream fiercely at the top of their lungs]

[Marisa ties Giuseppe to the chair with duct tape]

[Imogen splashes bleach all over Giuseppe's face]

[Myles sets Giuseppe on fire]

[Corey takes out a knife and slashes Giuseppe's throat]

Stacie: "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!!!"

Imogen: "This is for you, (bleep)!"

[Marisa splashes bleach on Stacie's face]

[Corey force-feeds Stacie vodka]

Pietro takes over
[Pietro calls Military School]

Sgt. Melissa Patrick: "Helllo?"

Pietro: "My name is Pietro Todaro and I am celebrating the holidays with my brothers and sister, and nieces and nephews in Helena, Montana. I am sending my 13-year old niece called Morisa, 12-year old niece called Imogen, 7-year old nephew named Myles, and 3-year old nephew named Corey, for their atrocious behavior towards my brother Giuseppe and adopted sister Stacie."

Sgt. Melissa Patrick:

Pietro: "Starting tomorrow."

Sgt. Melissa Patrick:

Pietro: "Three months shall do it."

Sgt. Melissa Patrick:

Pietro: "I have a MasterCard."

[Pietro calls 911]

911 Dispatcher: "Hello?"

Pietro: "This is Pietro Todaro from Helena, Montana. I'm going to need an ambulance for my adopted sister Stacie and biological brother Giuseppe. 13-year old Morisa tied Giuseppe to a chair with duct tape, 7-year old Myles set Giuseppe on fire, 12-year old Imogen splashed bleach all over Giuseppe's face, 3-year old Corey slashed Giuseppe's throat with a knife, Marisa splashed bleach all over Stacie's face, and Corey force-fed Stacie vodka."

Krampus the denomic beast
[Angelo is dressed as Krampus, the denomic beast, in Myles' room]

Angelo: (in a denomic, scary voice) "Young man, I have traveled from the Northern Alps to punish you, Morisa, Imogen, and Corey for the atrocious attitude, disrespect, and unfairness towards the father and the aunt this year."

[Angelo takes out the burlap sac, a cane, and a switch]

Angelo: (in a denomic, scary voice) "GET IN MY SAC!"

Imogen: "WAIT! IT'S ANGELO IN DISGUISE!"

[Imogen splashes bleach in Angelo's face and she and Marisa, Corey, and Myles flee]

Paula: "Congratulatuions, now Christmas is ruined."